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Would a loving partner stop you from CTB?
Thread starterAvril
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The fact that I have nobody like that is probably the main reason I have problems with my self worth and am suicidal. But hard to say if I'm not too far gone to recover even then, either way it won't happen anyways.
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darksouls, Cinnamorolls and lamy's sacred sleep
I don't know if it's enough to prevent my death but it would definitely help and that's one of my reasons for suicide, for instance if I found someone that genuinely loved/cared about me then it would cure my touch starvation, loneliness, sexlessness and isolation since I'm autistic I've heard that the only way to get out of isolation is by having a partner that would help to get me out of it.
Just a 3 AM thought, a mental exercise. I know most of us on here are terribly lonely. I know it is a horrible idea living for someone but I was wondering if, let's say, a beautiful person comes into your life, basically your dream man/woman, would that lessen your chances of CTB or at least cure some part of your depression?
Delusion/Cope : Was discarded in Dec 2024
Reality : Broke up in Dec 2024
Thought I would be with my person since 2022. He made me so happy. I never felt connected and attracted to someone before him. Then all gone.. All hopes and dreams... Back to where I was before meeting him. I have ntg before meeting him. I have ntg too after meeting him. Thing is I am getting older. Society and biology don't favour old people. Ageism, deteriorating health and infertility. I am in my .late 30, F. I really have ntg to offer at this point in my life. I made a lot of mistakes and I deeply regret it because they all lead to where I am now... Insignificant person..
Reactions:
darksouls, Cinnamorolls and lamy's sacred sleep
I'm sorry to hear about all your experiences, it seems that 50/50 yes and no. And some of us could pull through if we were genuinely loved. Fucking cruel world.
Reactions:
darksouls, lamy's sacred sleep and Cinnamorolls
Yes. I have been in relationships before but they were all physically and emotionally abusive. Having someone in my life who actually loves me and cares about me would make a huge difference in my mental state.
Maybe, but then you have to realise that the problem is you and so another person won't change that.
Let's say, hypothetically, I meet someone and fall in love with them and they me - my annoyingly suicidal brain starts to convince me they would be so much better off without me. I start pushing them away, which hurts them and me - how is this better than me just staying alone? At least then I'm just hurting myself and not another person.
No nothing could stop me from suicide. Plus I could never want a romantic partner anyway even if I
Didn't have any problems .The only thing I could ever want from another human is help with my suicide. But they made that a crime to keep us slaves and prisoners in the evil prison .
Even if I didn't have any problems why do I I have to get a partner or romantic partner? That crap is subjective to me.
Why do I have to get a gf?
So is life. Why do I have to live another minute?
To hell with all that garbage they repeatedly glorify like a romantic relationship and life and fighting to live.What i want us to avoid extreme torture . I want to avoid bad suffering and old age diseases pain problems.
A relationship with my shotgun that might help me get out of this hell. Glorifying my shotgun might help me
I will never want to exist for anything under any circumstances
Personally no, I think trying to keep with with the "loving relationship" could be a really big emotional burden, especially if I have very little energy. It's impossible to find someone with the exact same values and thoughts as you anyway
i think love is complicated and can come in so many different forms. for me though, i don't think it would change anything. i feel too numb to believe i'm lovable anyways
i think love is complicated and can come in so many different forms. for me though, i don't think it would change anything. i feel too numb to believe i'm lovable anyways
The only person who stopped me from CTB was my dad. He never knew my struggles but I knew that it would literally destroy him and I couldn't do that to him.
Yet I always knew that after he died, my desire to CTB would be stronger than ever. And it most definitely was. Minutes after his death I tried the window on the 4th floor of the hospital. Sadly it didn't open more than a few inches, although it maybe would not have been enough of a drop to be an effective method
Just a 3 AM thought, a mental exercise. I know most of us on here are terribly lonely. I know it is a horrible idea living for someone but I was wondering if, let's say, a beautiful person comes into your life, basically your dream man/woman, would that lessen your chances of CTB or at least cure some part of your depression?
It's more of a barrier to act upon it, i've been in relationships in a row for 6 years now and I would say being in a relationship doesn't take the mindset away fully, for one of my relationship it did since that one made me truly happy and look forward to a future, and it became very evident that my mind wasn't in the right place when that one ended, and in my current one, not really? Since i've grown to care for that person less and less considering they found me in a bad spot before
I thought my first relationship would be my turning point. I thought that they would help me get help, and that, for the first time in my life, someone saw me for who I truly am. I did my best to not put the onus of 'saving' me on them, and I didn't think our relationship would fix everything - just that I would get a fighting chance, with someone finally in my corner.
They, in fact, didn't follow through on promises of help, nor did they see me for who I am. All that happened was losing crucial time and gaining painful memories.
I've been slowly realizing how much it fucked me up, and how different it could have been if their love was what I thought it was.
If I had any other solid relationship in life - family or friend-wise - it might have also put the thought out of my mind.
That the part of the reason why I never dated. I don't want any more roots tying me down to existing on this plane of existence
Also there is so much drama in relationships. A friend a mine recently got married. And her ex-boyfriend from 10 years ago made a fake Facebook page with her picture in order to insult her.
Just a 3 AM thought, a mental exercise. I know most of us on here are terribly lonely. I know it is a horrible idea living for someone but I was wondering if, let's say, a beautiful person comes into your life, basically your dream man/woman, would that lessen your chances of CTB or at least cure some part of your depression?
Of course, in some ways, it would alleviate the urge to CBT for some people! Temporarily or forever. Meeting the man I love have me extra years. I catch the bus in two weeks and every day I'm pretty much just making nice memories and feeling good about managing to make it so long for him.
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