Will this work?

[galaticgrizzly]

Have you ever tried finding another? You have to trust your therapist for it to ever help. Don't be afraid to switch and keep trying until you find someone you do trust.

There are no other therapists in my area that would be a good fit for me that take my insurance

 

[k75]

I have had so many therapists, there are no more in my area that would be good for me that take my insurance.

I have had so many therapists there aren't any more in my area

Then use us. We're all hurting, but we can be very good at listening and support.

 

[Flippy]

I'm sure that you do deserve life. If you can't trust your therapist have you considered trying another? I'm sorry, I can't imagine what you've been through, so I'm struggling to offer advice. :-(

 

[galaticgrizzly]

Have you ever tried finding another? You have to trust your therapist for it to ever help. Don't be afraid to switch and keep trying until you find someone you do trust.

I have had so many therapists

 

[Qbert]

Please don't do this.

 

[galaticgrizzly]

I'm sure that you do deserve life. If you can't trust your therapist have you considered trying another? I'm sorry, I can't imagine what you've been through, so I'm struggling to offer advice. :-(

Unfortunately, another therapist is not an option

Please don't do this.

Why not?

 

[Flippy]

Then use us. We're all hurting, but we can be very good at listening and support.

I would encourage you to do this! Nobody here knows who you are, you are completely anonymous and you can talk about things that you might feel unable to in any other situation

 

[galaticgrizzly]

Have you ever tried finding another? You have to trust your therapist for it to ever help. Don't be afraid to switch and keep trying until you find someone you do trust.

This is the last therapist that was available

Then use us. We're all hurting, but we can be very good at listening and support.

I don't deserve support

 

[Lorntroubles]

Idk who has done this but seems a lot can go wrong. If this isn't impulsive then it seems silly to me. I hope one day you can explore all the megathreads because it's better to be successful in your attempts if your end goal is death.

 

[k75]

I don't deserve support

I disagree, and I'm offering support.

 

[galaticgrizzly]

Idk who has done this but seems a lot can go wrong. If this isn't impulsive then it seems silly to me. I hope one day you can explore all the megathreads because it's better to be successful in your attempts if your end goal is death.

Yes, I know it is risky, but again, I have tried every other way and this will at least punish me

I disagree, and I'm offering support.

You don't even know me, how could you say I deserve support?

 

[Flippy]

This is the last therapist that was available

I don't deserve support

I would say you do deserve support. None of what you have talked about here is your fault. There are a lot of friendly people here who will be willing to offer support! :-)

 

[galaticgrizzly]

I would say you do deserve support. None of what you have talked about here is your fault. There are a lot of friendly people here who will be willing to offer support! :-)

it is my fault though
to avoid any amputation, I will inject my chest. This way, it's closer to my heart.

 

[Ghost2211]

Why dirt? If want a good infection use feces. Regardless, this sounds like it would very much suck. Sepsis is quite uncomfortabl.

 

[k75]

Yes, I know it is risky, but again, I have tried every other way and this will at least punish me

You don't even know me, how could you say I deserve support?

What I'm seeing from your posts is you are a human in extreme pain, and it doesn't sound like you have anyone on your side. I see no evidence of you slaughtering puppies and kittens, so you can't be all that bad! I feel like you deserve all the support you can get.

 

[galaticgrizzly]

Why dirt? If want a good infection use feces. Regardless, this sounds like it would very much suck. Sepsis is quite uncomfortabl.

I'm using both, that's why I'm using water that had feces in it. Actual poop is too thick

 

[Flippy]

I can't think of any possible reason why it could be your fault. Please don't think like that. You have gone through something very traumatic, it makes sense that you are going to feel very low. I don't think the idea of injecting yourself with dirt is a good idea wherever you may do it.

 

[galaticgrizzly]

What I'm seeing from your posts is you are a human in extreme pain, and it doesn't sound like you have anyone on your side. I see no evidence of you slaughtering puppies and kittens, so you can't be all that bad! I feel like you deserve all the support you can get.

Everyone thinks I'm just attention seeking

I can't think of any possible reason why it could be your fault. Please don't think like that. You have gone through something very traumatic, it makes sense that you are going to feel very low. I don't think the idea of injecting yourself with dirt is a good idea wherever you may do it.

Not just dirt, dirt and poop

 

[Ghost2211]

I'm using both, that's why I'm using water that had feces in it. Actual poop is too thick

I see, so you thought out logistics. Do you want to talk about what you feel you have done to deserve such a fate? I can see you are hurting, and don't feel you deserve compassion, but sometimes kindness can go a long way.

 

[Flippy]

Everyone thinks I'm just attention seeking

Not just dirt, dirt and poop

Being accused of attention seeking is something I can definitely relate too. That's usually what people say when they want to pretend things are fine. I don't think you are an attention seeker. I think you are feeling some very difficult emotions and you deserve help and support.

 

[k75]

Everyone thinks I'm just attention seeking

Unfortunately, that's not uncommon. You know you aren't, and that's what counts most. My family refused to believe I was raped because it was an old boyfriend. They said I was lying because I was pregnant. The only thing that got me through was knowing they were wrong.

 

[galaticgrizzly]

I see, so you thought out logistics. Do you want to talk about what you feel you have done to deserve such a fate? I can see you are hurting, and don't feel you deserve compassion, but sometimes kindness can go a long way.

I eat all the food in the house and my parents say I'm disgusting and selfish and they're right

Being accused of attention seeking is something I can definitely relate too. That's usually what people say when they want to pretend things are fine. I don't think you are an attention seeker. I think you are feeling some very difficult emotions and you deserve help and support.

I deserve to die.

Unfortunately, that's not uncommon. You know you aren't, and that's what counts most. My family refused to believe I was raped because it was an old boyfriend. They said I was lying because I was pregnant. The only thing that got me through was knowing they were wrong.

When I die, they'll probably think that was for attention too

 

[k75]

I eat all the food in the house and my parents say I'm disgusting and selfish and they're right

I deserve to die.

By that logic, every growing teenager in the world should die.

 

[Ghost2211]

I eat all the food in the house and my parents say I'm disgusting and selfish and they're right

I deserve to die.

Im sorry your parents are being so unkind. Are you having weight issues they are shaming you for?

 

[galaticgrizzly]

Im sorry your parents are being so unkind. Are you having weight issues they are shaming you for?

yes they say I'm going to get diabetes

 

[Flippy]

I eat all the food in the house and my parents say I'm disgusting and selfish and they're right

I deserve to die.

When I die, they'll probably think that was for attention too

I go from eating everything in sight then I stop and don't eat anything hardly for days. I do this because I'm trying to comfort myself. You are probably trying to comfort yourself with food too?

I'm sure you don't deserve to die!

 

[galaticgrizzly]

By that logic, every growing teenager in the world should die.

They hide food and I find it. They say I am going to die of a heart attack

I go from eating everything in sight then I stop and don't eat anything hardly for days. I do this because I'm trying to comfort myself. You are probably trying to comfort yourself with food too?

I'm sure you don't deserve to die!

I do though

 

[Flippy]

You don't. You might believe that because you are feeling distressed but it's not true!

 

[galaticgrizzly]

You don't. You might believe that because you are feeling distressed but it's not true!

I just don't see why I should keep living tbh

 

[Ghost2211]

yes they say I'm going to get diabetes

Would going to a therapist or medical doctor to try to figure out the cause of the compulsive eating might be an option? what they say to you is wrong. You do have value, and sometime you need to look outside of your family to get the love you deserve.