Help Who do I even talk to about having vengeful thoughts w/o getting locked up?

[phantomisgone]

I've just been so angry these past years ever since my CTB attempt. Angry because the people who driven me to do so get to live all happily with their lives. As if they never did anything wrong to me. My whole reality has been altered because of all of them. Sure it's "better" now and they aren't necessarily in my life anymore, but I still have to deal with what they did to me.

I don't want to physically hurt them. I just want to verbally let out my frustration, but I can't, nor will it help because I can't make people care about what they did to me... unless they actually felt how I felt.

I can't speak to:

• A counselor/therapist at my College because they will immediately flag me
• My parents because they believe that I'm doing better now (plus they witnessed the aftermath of my CTB attempt)
• The people who did me wrong because they will not even care and even make things worse
• My friends because they don't know how I truly feel and it would overwhelm them

I just have no one to talk to while these thoughts happen to me once a week. I just hate how I have to deal with this, while they get to wander around, as if they were innocent.

 

[offbalance]

I mean I've talked to my therapist about similar things and he didn't mind. Maybe try finding a therapist not at your school? It kind of seems you're overthinking it though because you said you don't even want to physically hurt them, many therapists have heard much worse than someone who just wants to tell off their past perpetrators.