That's basically the gist of my problems. I do get along well with my cat though, but the only friend I really have that actually listens and respects my opinions is a product of my imagination, as pathetic as that sounds. As far as sapient beings go, I do feel alone and alienated in this world. I guess I feel a bit vindicated in that a lot of my opinions included predictions of future events, most of which came true, even if people tried to say they wouldn't. I think the thing about Autism is that the problem isn't with the inflicted individual, and it isn't with wider society either. Instead, the problem is a relative one where the two entities are so mentally different from one another that it puts distance between them. And since I'm in the minority, it means being scorned and ignored by people, and worse, people who hire for jobs, which is probably why I'm currently unemployed and will almost certainly remain that way my whole life.
But yes, living in a world where nobody respects you as a mature adult person just like them, or at best, in my case, sees you as a sex object, or listens to your words with the assumption they come from a sick and twisted mind that is unworthy of real consideration, and should only be listened to to make you feel better about yourself? That's a good reason to CTB. I just got the COVID shot recently and I couldn't even get injected without one of the medical staff talking down to me like I was a kid. Even though many people got injected that day, multiple people kept checking on *me* specifically and not them to make conflicting demands of me and criticize me when I can't fulfill all of them. I had to play along because I knew fighting against it never went well, but even that was such a humiliating experience that it's why I never like leaving the house and prefer to immerse myself in role playing video games where my character is actually treated like a person.
