Discussion what's the reason you're still here?

[DeadManLiving]

Looong story (saving it for the end). But why still here? To Watch. Watching the bloodbath of manipulative, destructive backstabbing nature and condition of human behavior. Once from within the engine of market microstructures, then from outside; sometimes through a microscope or pirescope as a scientist would study a culture of microbes attacking and devouring each other.

Until such time it ceases to interest and to be.

 

[Rogue_Gendarme]

Biding my time and trying to ease myself into peace and liberation through death, before my actual, final moments. I want to eat cheesecake again before I die, I want to try deep dish pizzas. I want to be able to drink Soju again, and I want to sell my guitar so I can get money and do as I please with it. I want to sleep well a few more nights before my final sleep. I want to play music with my friends. I want to sing songs before I sing my death rattle. I want to see my country's beauty before I turn my back and leave her behind, eventually. I want to talk with friends and see their smiles again, before my smile disappears forever. I want to do all of that and more, but I've only got a month left.

I don't want to worry about that, I don't want to worry at all. I'm creating my peace before my liberation. All that matters now is the present, counting days before the final hour.

 

[Kitty_Can't_2026]

I have a dog that I love so much the mere thought of him might bring me to tears and he anchors me to this shit life. I cannot bear the possibility of him being left alone here.

Yep, I'm totally the same. My cat is everything and I don't have anyone who would take care of her if I wasn't here.
I'm responsible for her. So I'll keep at this life until she's no longer.
That's my plan anyway.

 

[xXiloveyouXx]

AI will likely stop aging within 2-3 decades and most medical problems will be curable. If you don't enjoy being alive it's one thing, but if this is just a fear of getting old, the fear may be misplaced: if you are in the 18-24 range (and you seem young to me), if you don't commit suicide, AGI (General Artificial Intelligence) is going to happen while you're alive almost certainly, and scientists are already working on the aging problem. It's very unlikely any aging will be happening after 2060 for anyone in a wealthy country.

If you won't be able to experience it until you're already 50 why bother? Who wants to be 50 forever?

 

[fadedghost]

If you won't be able to experience it until you're already 50 why bother? Who wants to be 50 forever?

I think you are misunderstanding.

They will likely stop aging and reverse aging. You won't look 50.

Aging is caused by different reasons:
Intracellular waste
Intercellular waste
Nucleus mutations
Mitochondrial mutations
Stem cells loss
Increase in senescent cells
Increase of intercellular protein links[/center]


If they get those things under control, it's not like you would be 50 and look and feel like a 50 year old.

 

[Life's not a comedy]

Hard to put into words. I guess extreme fatigue and fear of the feelings and roadblocks that will come with getting everything finalized. I don't have a clear checklist because everything is so uncertain.

 

[Seneca65AD]

Just like many of the previous responses, it comes down to "hope".... and enough good things seem to happen at just the right time to interfere with any concrete plans.

 

[UnPlugMe69]

Absolutely nothing!
I am not technically doing the deliberate act of staying. But rather I can't leave. Due to the my body being structurally oriented towards an avoidance or extreme aversion to Pain. At this point I am not really choosing to be here. Every means I find seems to be blocked by a wall. Like acquiring means of CTB like Pew pew , N, SN. The state has truly outdone itself in keeping me trapped in this in Indignifying existence. Soon enough I will be in a situation where I have the means.

 

[sdco23]

me personally, there's something so jarring on knowing how my life will end. I've accepted it, hell in fact I've seen it as the most peaceful way to go. I don't wanna grow old and get sickly and wrinkly, and then suffer with god knows how many physical and mental problems before finally taking my last breath.

I've considered doing it out of spite. I've considered guilt tripping some people who I hate so they could live with guilt for the rest of their lives.
but thinking back, I don't wanna go out bitter. I don't want my last action, my last decision, to be made out of spite or rage. I don't want to take my last breath angry and defeated.

so it's kinda ironic, honestly.. because I want to get better so my last moments of life would be peaceful. I think that desire to choose myself for once is one of the reasons why I'm still here.

Mainly because of my dog. I've been able to convince myself that my only two relatives that care would get over it, even if they'd be temporarily broken. He'd get over it too, but someone has to keep him safe. With me, he loves everyone and everything - except for bodies of water, vacuums, and the rain. He doesn't have issues like resource guarding or aggression because he's never known pain. He might change if he has to live around my aunt's rowdy/huge puppies. I never want him to change from fear. He's so pure of heart. He'd be able to ride nimbus for sure.

 

[charlavail]

Delayed it as I was getting "help" so thought I had nothing to lose by giving it a chance.

Then my cat had a tumour growth and needed surgery so decided to delay it til she's fully recovered.

Now I just need to research an effective new method that I can get hold of then I'm out. Even if that means jumping in front of a train. I don't care anymore.

I'm sorry to hear about your cat. she's the only reason i havent ctb yet (for now)

 

[Tommen Baratheon]

Waiting for Drion's Pill to be available (without prescription) at the local pharmacy.

 

[itsallogrenow]

I'm sorry to hear about your cat. she's the only reason i havent ctb yet (for now)

She's lucky to have you

 

[Aflame5926]

Waiting for Drion's Pill to be available (without prescription) at the local pharmacy.

my wet dream jesus.....

lazyness also i just found a big dump on this site. i need to get in and make a plan out of it

 

[Seneca65AD]

Mainly because of my dog. I've been able to convince myself that my only two relatives that care would get over it, even if they'd be temporarily broken. He'd get over it too, but someone has to keep him safe. With me, he loves everyone and everything - except for bodies of water, vacuums, and the rain. He doesn't have issues like resource guarding or aggression because he's never known pain. He might change if he has to live around my aunt's rowdy/huge puppies. I never want him to change from fear. He's so pure of heart. He'd be able to ride nimbus for sure.

I applaud you - putting up with the bullshit of life to make sure an innocent little animal is safe. Well done!!

 

[WantingOut2]

For me personally, not having a surefire way to end this misery. I'm so lost in terms of knowing how the end it all. I mean I was deep down hoping for WW3 just for the chance my town could be blown up and I could be dead already; so to put it mildly, I don't know how to end it, but I want my life over already.

 

[foreverlanguish]

I originally disabled my account a year ago because I was certain my life was turning around for the better, that I became a good person. (Un)fortunately, no...and I say that because I'd rather die more than live another few decades here. Account or not I've lurked here ever since and have done so years before. I want to kill myself and have a method (homemade Co2) in place but I'm scared to do it... I'm hoping I will do everything right by educating myself on my method maybe a little more and hopefully garner the motivation I need to successfully CTB. Living in this reality has been nothing but inherently harmful to me and everyone I've ever met.

 

[wannabeangel]

my family, especially my mom, and also my ex husband who i promised i would be safe to, which was a mistake of mine making a promise thats so hard to keep

 

[StalkedByDeath]

I am a firm believer in "Trying Everything before Ending Everything". That's why I'm still here. I want to see what the future holds, even if I will die by my own hands someday. Having SN has ironically made things easier because I know I'm not stuck. When it's time to go I have that option, so I might as well hang on for as long as I can manage. You never know how what's in store, and things can get better.

 

[TheOtakuLurker]

I'm here because i'm awaiting the day i find the courage to finally die.