I'm very slow at doing things and life is all about time and speed. Being very slow is disadvantageous.
This life is so cruel and unfair, why can't I get what I want? My dream then a peaceful method
WadeingThru
Experienced
- Feb 25, 2022
- 209
You might try working in the bbq industry. It takes hours to smoke the meats. And all the top tier bbq places have long lines that move slow. Folks stand in line for hours.
ImsooDone1N
Arcanist
- Nov 22, 2018
- 846
I'm in a weird funk & I can't get out of. I'm beyond depressed. I'm craving opiates, I'm so lonely it hurts & I'm starting to get apathetic about things, starting to feel numb & isolated.
Sherri
Archangel
- Sep 28, 2020
- 13,794
This whole war with Ukraine, because of a small piece of land that Russians want it back. When humans will stop acting live savages. As an European my heart and support goes to Ukraine and all it's people.
That Kleiner's Uraine Thread was deleted for no good reason. No one was even fighting in it! but we seemingly can still have multiple other Ukraine threads 
S like suicide
Enlightened
- Apr 29, 2021
- 1,435
That i have to wait...that i'm alone all the time,that i'm not even able to get up from bed
Nanako
Experienced
- Dec 24, 2018
- 287
Feeling a little detached from everything, again. It's a bad feeling, like I'm all alone in the world and only I can understand the physical and mental discomfort that I'm forced to deal with. But the worst part is how anxious it makes me feel, that everything is going to get much worse and there's nothing I can do about it.
NSA
Your friendly neighborhood agent
- Feb 21, 2022
- 262
I want to paint or draw something but can't seem to fucking make myself.
Boireannach Brònach
Cho crosta ri cat fiadhaich
- Feb 24, 2022
- 25
My typical anxiety mixed with deep self-hatred is worse than usual tonight. Terrified of everything and hating myself for being terrified.
Nolan96
Mage
- Feb 12, 2022
- 506
Sherri
Archangel
- Sep 28, 2020
- 13,794
Losing someone I really cared for. Meant the world to me.
I'm sorry dear, I feel similarly
Sherri
Archangel
- Sep 28, 2020
- 13,794
Yeah you try and give the best to someone , to boost someone's life like someone once did for me, but some people just don't want to make an effort . Had to let that person go, though my heart aches. Thank you. Hugs
Boireannach Brònach
Cho crosta ri cat fiadhaich
- Feb 24, 2022
- 25
I'm so scared about the state of the world right now. I don't want innocent people to suffer and die
Kristicide
I am a prisoner locked up behind xanax bars
- Dec 16, 2021
- 330
My neck hurts no matter if I sit up or lay down. Heat and ice don't help. So annoying
Manaaja
euROPE
- Sep 10, 2018
- 1,382
Woke up with the throat feeling really awful, and with an awful brainfog and cough. I feel dead. I feel tired and body doesn't work and muscles feel weak. I can't stop coughing all the fucking mold dust cat piss.
I have said it a million times. This house isn't fit for living, this should be either completely renovated or destroyed.
I tried winning in lottery in order to afford doing things myself because the "landlords" aka "relatives" don't care if everything is in mold, dust, cat piss and needs to be repaired, they don't care if I die just because they are too lazy and stupid and selfish to follow the laws and rules. I never wanted to live here. I was living in my own apartment when parents came and just brought my items here WITHOUT MY PERMISSION
IMAGINE IF THOSE RETARDED "MANAAJA'S PARENTS" BROKE INTO YOUR APARTMENT, STOLE YOUR STUFF, BROUGHT IT INTO A PISS, MOLD, DUST FILLED PLACE WITHOUT CLEAN WATER OR WORKING TOILET OR ANY KIND OF AIR CONDITIONING AND FORCED YOU TO PAY THEM FOR IT?!!!!!!!!!!!
I wish I could skip this day and go to a better world, much better world. I didn't ask for any of this. I just want to be with my friends. In happiness and love and peace and quiet.
I have said it a million times. This house isn't fit for living, this should be either completely renovated or destroyed.
I tried winning in lottery in order to afford doing things myself because the "landlords" aka "relatives" don't care if everything is in mold, dust, cat piss and needs to be repaired, they don't care if I die just because they are too lazy and stupid and selfish to follow the laws and rules. I never wanted to live here. I was living in my own apartment when parents came and just brought my items here WITHOUT MY PERMISSION
IMAGINE IF THOSE RETARDED "MANAAJA'S PARENTS" BROKE INTO YOUR APARTMENT, STOLE YOUR STUFF, BROUGHT IT INTO A PISS, MOLD, DUST FILLED PLACE WITHOUT CLEAN WATER OR WORKING TOILET OR ANY KIND OF AIR CONDITIONING AND FORCED YOU TO PAY THEM FOR IT?!!!!!!!!!!!
I wish I could skip this day and go to a better world, much better world. I didn't ask for any of this. I just want to be with my friends. In happiness and love and peace and quiet.
BagofBones
Member
- Jan 1, 2019
- 43
Manaaja
euROPE
- Sep 10, 2018
- 1,382
I found an old moldy mat full of mold and my relative's cat's piss and poop. It made me hate my relatives even more.
They are the type of "Just because you suddenly have lots of breathing problems doesn't mean it's from mold, cat piss and cat poop! They are perfectly healthy and normal!" but also "Hey you idiot! Don't open the window! Do you know how much toxic air will come in?!". I know that if I keep that mat it will be very unhealthy for me but I also know that if I throw that old moldy, pooped, pissed mat away, I get to hear how I'm worse than any dictator in the world for throwing a "perfectly good mat" away.
I truly wish to move to a planet without relatives. Sometimes I feel all the bad things in the world are the result of them.
They are the type of "Just because you suddenly have lots of breathing problems doesn't mean it's from mold, cat piss and cat poop! They are perfectly healthy and normal!" but also "Hey you idiot! Don't open the window! Do you know how much toxic air will come in?!". I know that if I keep that mat it will be very unhealthy for me but I also know that if I throw that old moldy, pooped, pissed mat away, I get to hear how I'm worse than any dictator in the world for throwing a "perfectly good mat" away.
I truly wish to move to a planet without relatives. Sometimes I feel all the bad things in the world are the result of them.
Sherri
Archangel
- Sep 28, 2020
- 13,794
Still my package hasn't arrived. Stuck at customs for 32 days now, trying not to lose my min more than I am already. Maybe I should just forget about it and move on.
Manaaja
euROPE
- Sep 10, 2018
- 1,382
I hope it arrives soon. SN or something else?
Customs can suck a lot. One time I ordered a video game and had to spent lots of hours and energy trying to explain to the customs that it's just a video game. Because you can't just put in "It's a PSP video game" you have to write a code that means "PSP video game" and I couldn't find that code anywhere. I read the whole million pages long customs codes list twenty times and finally had to phone call them, even though I hate phone calls because of my social anxiety.
I too am waiting for my SN it's been stuck at customs for a few days. I hope it arrives as soon as possible.
Sherri
Archangel
- Sep 28, 2020
- 13,794
No sn I got it before they changed the laws this past years regarding getting products from outside the EU, strangely enough my sn came from Ukraine. Hope the seller is ok. It's just a small present one Of my friends sent me from Australia. And because it's not eu it's stuck in customs with all the other packages just to charge us 23% of my country tax. So basically yeah I have to pay to get a present. Gotta love my country. A no care atittude.
Deadly_Intention
Member
- Apr 10, 2021
- 77
When I try to do the right thing, I still end up hurting people immensely. It just never ends, the pain I cause over and over again.
Squalo
A Fatal Mistake
- Jan 14, 2021
- 657
I'm afraid of my future, I only see a black abyss.
Dr Iron Arc
Into the Unknown
- Feb 10, 2020
- 20,982
Kind of upset that they announced a new Pokémon game is coming soon. It's probably gonna come out in November which is way after I planned to CTB. I'm also bothered by the fact that such a trivial thing is even enough to put me in a position to reconsider something as heavy as suicide in the first place. Should I just cut my losses and try again to CTB in about two years? I really can't sustain my current way of living for long though because I've been operating under the basis that I'm going to be dead later this year.
So many people keep telling me there's hope for me and my situation. I don't think they understand just how little strength I actually have in me. I'm not trying to be self deprecating or defeatist. I genuinely see it as being realistic. There's no point in someone like me to try to become something I'm not. It would be like hoping that one day I'm going to sprout wings and a horn so that I could one day become an alicorn. It's just not happening.
So many other people are suffering through worse and if they had my life they could probably easily make their way out of it if they have the mental and physical power I clearly lack. I'd gladly give it to them if I could if it meant I could die. I don't think I will actually reconsider, because for me the risks still far exceed the rewards for staying alive…
So many people keep telling me there's hope for me and my situation. I don't think they understand just how little strength I actually have in me. I'm not trying to be self deprecating or defeatist. I genuinely see it as being realistic. There's no point in someone like me to try to become something I'm not. It would be like hoping that one day I'm going to sprout wings and a horn so that I could one day become an alicorn. It's just not happening.
So many other people are suffering through worse and if they had my life they could probably easily make their way out of it if they have the mental and physical power I clearly lack. I'd gladly give it to them if I could if it meant I could die. I don't think I will actually reconsider, because for me the risks still far exceed the rewards for staying alive…
