Discussion What kills you slowly every day?

[xxRoro]

The question can be interpreted in more than one way.
The poll aims more to what you do to your body every day that kills you slowly, like unhealthy coping mechanisms. (If you have a good one I didn't think about I'll add them to the poll)

But you can also share what social pressure has done to you or other unhealthy habits you have.

My coping mechanisms are: smoking, taking drugs (not every day), tattooing myself, self harm, binge eating (very rarely) TikTok

 

[Groot]

The question can be interpreted in more than one way.
The poll aims more to what you do to your body every day that kills you slowly, like unhealthy coping mechanisms. (If you have a good one I didn't think about I'll add them to the poll)

But you can also share what social pressure has done to you or other unhealthy habits you have.

My coping mechanisms are: smoking, taking drugs (not every day), tattooing myself, self harm, binge eating (very rarely) TikTok

My insomnia deffo be knocking years of my life , my unhealthy coping mechanisms are: smoking weed (main one for sure) , drinking, other drugs sometimes too but not as much anymore

 

[rozeske]

Living is what's killing me slowly.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

Aging

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Rotting alive at home every day bc of my circumstances.

 

[Silent_cries]

Physically it would have to be self harming, I sh in multiple various ways, some intentionally, and some impulsivly. Cutting, bruising, banging, swallowing foreign objects etc.

Mentally it's being constantly reminded of how I screwed up my entire life, and the fact that I've had to endure hell for several years and will have to endure it for several more months to go bc of it. I made my own life so much worse than it ever had to be, and I will always hate myself for it more than anything.

 

[TiredOfAllThis]

Fear and anxiety

 

[xxRoro]

Physically it would have to be self harming, I sh in multiple various ways, some intentionally, and some impulsivly. Cutting, bruising, banging, swallowing foreign objects etc.

When it comes to sh as a child I didn't know how to and I ended up smashing my head against the wall or screaming "my heart should stop beating"

In my youth the impulsive ones are cutting myself and now a very good one for me is bite in my arms. It hurts very good but the marks are going away after a day

 

[RedDoor]

My way of thinking

 

[sserafim]

My thoughts, internet addiction, SS addiction, and escapist tendencies. I don't want to face reality. I wish I could live in my dreams forever. Also, the demands of life are killing me. Life itself is too much for me. Time and entropy are slowly killing me

 

[justcallmeJ]

Mainly my thoughts, they eat every bit of sanity in my brain thats left. My being stuck situation, anorexia and self harm is also harming me a lot :(

 

[Winterreise]

No physical contact with anyone

 

[Silent_cries]

When it comes to sh as a child I didn't know how to and I ended up smashing my head against the wall or screaming "my heart should stop beating"

In my youth the impulsive ones are cutting myself and now a very good one for me is bite in my arms. It hurts very good but the marks are going away after a day

My impulsive ones are usually either bruising or other kinds of self injury, my none impulsive one is almost always cutting and I usually do it to calm down my emotions before it goes too far, while with the impulsive ones it usually has gone too far already, hence my impulses.
I started cutting as a teenager, but then it was never impulsivly as it was more or less a coping strategy at the time. My sh impulses started for only a few months ago in fact when I descovered that causing myself excruciangly physical pain makes my unbearble anxiety go away. So now I get impulsive everytime my anxiety gets too unbearble and sometimes I get weird impulses out of the blue. Only reason I haven't hurt myself more than I have is bc I haven't had the energy most of the time. Sh does take alot of effort after all.

 

[strangelife]

my illness

 

[sserafim]

No physical contact with anyone

Why do you want physical contact with people?

 

[xxRoro]

My impulsive ones are …

My selfharm is very low at this point. It seems that I kind of SKIP it and come right to CTB plans and I don't know if that's really better

 

[ijustwishtodie]

My thoughts, internet addiction, SS addiction, and escapist tendencies. I don't want to face reality. I wish I could live in my dreams forever. Also, the demands of life are killing me. Life itself is too much for me

Do you think that you will be forced to face reality one day or do you think you'll ctb before then? I don't want to face reality either but I feel like I may have to because suicide is scary and risky as hell

 

[sserafim]

Do you think that you will be forced to face reality one day or do you think you'll ctb before then? I don't want to face reality either but I feel like I may have to because suicide is scary and risky as hell

Yeah, unfortunately I think that I'll eventually have to face reality one day. I think I might ctb before then to escape. Ctb is my only option when the inevitable comes. However, I'll probably be too scared to actually attempt (due to the risk and consequences of failure), and instead be forced to face reality. I hate how everything in life is basically a risk analysis

 

[Silent_cries]

My selfharm is very low at this point. It seems that I kind of SKIP it and come right to CTB plans and I don't know if that's really better

I don't do it very often nowadays either. I still get urges sometimes, but usually don't end up acting on them due to not having the energy. I too skip to ctb plans, but don't rly end up acting on those either most of the time.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

Yeah, unfortunately I think that I'll eventually have to face reality one day. I think I might ctb before then to escape. Ctb is my only option when the inevitable comes. However, I'll probably be too scared to actually attempt (due to the risk of failure), and instead be forced to face reality.

This truly is a hard fact to acknowledge... probably because it may perhaps be the more realistic fact. I'm still relying on ctb instead of living on because I just have to ctb. At some point, the stress and pressures of being an adult will get to me and I'd eventually ctb (adulthood is already getting to me but not enough to where I'd run away from my parents house and ctb). I feel like I will have to kill myself eventually, I just don't know when

 

[BlendedHeart]

Loneliness

 

[wheredidigo]

My way of thinking

I hear you, wish I could escape from my own thoughts too

 

[sserafim]

Loneliness

Why? What exactly about it?

 

[jemetire]

her absence

 

[FuneralCry]

I just see existing as a futile process of slowly dying and waiting to die anyway. No matter what happens every second is one second closer to reaching the inevitable. And personally I'm not really into self harm as I don't wish to be harmed in any way, instead I wish for the eternal absence of all harm, I suffer enough simply by being conscious and aware.
Existence on it's own is harmful enough especially as there is no limit as to how much agony one can feel as long as they exist, to exist means to suffer so unnecessarily all while risking experiencing much worse suffering at any moment and I'm tired of suffering in this cruel and meaningless existence.

 

[EmptyHeaded]

Nothing (UwU). Luckily, I guess. Not that it would make a big difference anymore.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Bad diet. Isolation. My job uses a bunch of carcinogens- aerosols etc.

I expect we're all damaging our health simply breathing, drinking water and eating anything- I expect just about everything is contaminated now.

 

[Morte]

thoughts, work, isolation, entrophy

 

[sserafim]

thoughts, work, isolation, entrophy

Unfortunately, entropy is inescapable. It's killing me too. How and why is isolation killing you?

Aging

Same

 

[ijustwishtodie]

thoughts, work, isolation, entrophy

If I may ask, why entropy? Isn't that just a concept in physics used to derive one of the laws of thermodynamics? How would entropy make you suicidal?