Discussion What is Your #1 Reason for Not Wanting to Live?

[TooMuchHasHappened]

Being trapped in a broken body (well what I consider a broken body) is my #1 as this is where all my other issues have stemmed from, including my broken my mind. I've had so many injuries and 15 surgeries, that my body does not work properly any more and I have chronic pain and dysfunction. There's A LOT more to my story, I could write a book, but that's basically it, and nothing can be done. This has completely ruined my life and is preventing me from having any sort of a life that I want to live. I can't train/exercise (which was my life), or work, and spend most of my days in bed or on the couch, and rarely go out. For me this is absolutely devastating. I've lost 3 great careers, have no life, don't speak to any friends anymore, I just exist, but not for much longer. Once I've got my affairs in order and done as much as I can to reduce the stress on my parents after my departure from this existence, then I will CTB, I've had enough now. Well actually, I had enough a long time ago, I've just recently decided that I'm going to CTB, hopefully in about 3 months time. I've stopped all my therapies etc and trying to get better, as nothing has improved my situation in the slightest. I've accepted my fate and made peace with it, it is what it is. If I can't live the life that I want and have to suffer for the rest of my life being trapped in this body, then I'd rather just end it, I've suffered enough.

 

[Forever Sleep]

It pretty much comes down to hating having to pay for life and all the neverending chores it requires to sustain it.

 

[SchizoPolyGymnast]

I don't want to feel the pain of losing my parents after years of caring for them. A general sense of having regrets.

 

[chudpolonais]

i quite frankly have no reason to live

i tried everything and failed miserably every time
everything and everyone that i've ever had is gone
my only option left is the rope

 

[HamDrone]

never was in the thought of it just in the past couple months everything started to feel empty, like nothing really matters or mattered what i do or did in the same way how no one that i consider friends or family has now become empty sometimes literally physically feeling a hole through your chest even when im not alone.

 

[Atticuss]

My other half left after 14 years together. I've tried but I don't know how to function without her, and I don't want to. Everything since has been meaningless to me.

 

[voc_89]

No peace. My mind is always in turmoil. Overthinking, worrying, dreading. Lol I am starting to tear up typing this. I hate living like this. I despise this existence

 

[pieceoffox]

I've never seen the point of living. I've never seen a future for myself. I consider myself a burden to everyone, a useless piece of baggage. I'm mentally tired of existing in this world and see a way out and peace in death.

 

[windowinstaller]

damage from meds my parents forced me to take when i was a kid.
i was fine beforehand but i got suspended from school and said i wanted to kms during that time so they doped me up with a bunch if meds and now i got PSSD and anhedonia and brain damage