What do you self medicate with?

[Rukia]

Booze & sometimes sweets...

 

[kappa]

I've never tried Flexeral. I wanted to try Soma as it's metabolized into meprobamate, which was a wildly popular tranquilizer back in the 1950s. The reason I wanted to try meprobamate was because I have disabling anxiety which benzos entirely fail to control.


Back in 2003 I started on Valium 40 mg/day and that did nothing. My GP wan't brave enough to go higher than that so I found a psychiatrist who absolutely loved benzos. He put me on 10 mg of Xanax daily (equal to 100 mg Valium) from 2003 to 2012. Even that dose didn't really do anything, though I kept taking it as I hoped it did at least a little something. All Xanax did was kill my sex drive (back when I actually had one -- I don't any more despite years off benzos). In an effort to see if Xanax does anything at any dose I once tried 120 mg in a single dose. I don't recall if it actually calmed me any, but I got a 5 hour nap from which I awoke feeling the same as usual. I've also tried Ativan, Klonopin, Onfi (bet you never heard of that one), clonazolam and a number of other research chemical benzos.

Since this is a suicide forum, I probably need to point out that 120 mg Xanax was not some half-assed suicide attempt. I am fully aware that the LD50 is something ridiculously high like 900 mg/kg in rats such that you'd need many thousands of bars to produce death. It's so exceptionally unlikely that I'm not even aware of a single documented case of death by Xanax alone, though it certainly does pop up often enough in deaths (with a pharmacy of other drugs, especially alcohol & opioids).

I slept like a baby with flexeral. Quick acting and I couldn't stay asleep even if I wanted to.

125mg Xanax? I had a bottle of 90 1 mg and I abused it for about 5 days because falling unconscious and having to be at a hospital on ventilator. How did you just sleep on that, that's insane.

 

[marcusuk63]

nicotine , chocolate ,nicotine , coffee , nicotine

 

[TimeToDie]

125mg Xanax? I had a bottle of 90 1 mg and I abused it for about 5 days because falling unconscious and having to be at a hospital on ventilator. How did you just sleep on that, that's insane.

120 mg Xanax -- 60 x 2 mg bars. I'm surprised that you ended up on a ventilator from that. I had read that the standard treatment for benzo OD (something that is basically never fatal) is to simply let the patient sleep it off. So you nap in the ER for thousands or dollars as opposed to a $49 bed at Motel 6. I knew a woman who took 50 mg of Ativan and her mom called 911. She ended up in the ER against her will and that Ativan didn't even make her fall asleep, so far from a medical emergency. Yeah, I'm know that I'm an extreme oddity. I know there are other people who would be out cold from just 1 mg.

I have tried an even higher benzo dose. It was with some research chemical, I think clonazolam, and I took a whole fistful of pills. I don't know how many but likely 50+. I don't remember that calming me, but I definitely remember being unable to walk or even stand. I remember crawling on the floor to the bathroom & I have no idea how I manage to use to toilet, but since there are no urine stains on my carpet I must have done it somehow.

 

[Oblivion Lover]

I know it isn't exactly what you are talking about, but when I save enough money for it I will buy Ritalin from a family's friend to treat my self-diagnosed ADHD (can't bother to find a psychiatrist willing to accept that ADHD is an actual disease). If it works, I will not ctb, at least for now.