Discussion What do you do when you miss someone so much you just want to die?

[FadingSnowFake]

As per title. Just when I think it's impossible to miss a person more, I wake up this morning, and I do. How do you get through another day knowing tomorrow is going to be worse without this person? How is it possible to just get emptier inside when you are already empty inside?

 

[Pale_Rider]

For me it takes time. Gain some truth from it at the end maybe. Recognizing it going to take time just like a broken leg would helps me. An injury to get through. Eventually I'll learn how to live with it. Slowly.

 

[AlighieriTTT]

I don't know. It never truly goes away. You can go years and be okay but one night those feelings will always come rushing back. I'm sorry

 

[outrider567]

As per title. Just when I think it's impossible to miss a person more, I wake up this morning, and I do. How do you get through another day knowing tomorrow is going to be worse without this person? How is it possible to just get emptier inside when you are already empty inside?

3.5 years for me, it just gets worse all the time, a lonely and depressing world without her, nothing helps, nothing ever will

 

[Nightfoot]

Think about the things you appreciate about them and let that comfort you. Time will do the rest.

 

[FadingSnowFake]

For me it takes time. Gain some truth from it at the end maybe. Recognizing it going to take time just like a broken leg would helps me. An injury to get through. Eventually I'll learn how to live with it. Slowly.

Thanks and sorry for your hurt too. I think for some injuries there may be no end. Perhaps only in death.

Think about the things you appreciate about them and let that comfort you. Time will do the rest.

Thanks, it's difficult. Now, it hurts more than it comforts. Best to deny it's even happening.

3.5 years for me, it just gets worse all the time, a lonely and depressing world without her, nothing helps, nothing ever will

I'm sorry. Do you just keep on hoping or believing in something? How do you keep going?

I don't know. It never truly goes away. You can go years and be okay but one night those feelings will always come rushing back. I'm sorry

I'm sorry too. Sending hugs.

 

[LastLoveSong]

Idk im just gonna die and find out

 

[Satori Komeiji]

Usually it helps to fill in the hole they left in their absence with new things. This could be new friends, new hobbies, anything really. It won't solve your problem outright but it can help. Easier said than done when you have depression, obviously but anything, no matter how minor will help.

 

[FadingSnowFake]

Idk im just gonna die and find out

Wish you could let me know, all the best.

Usually it helps to fill in the hole they left in their absence with new things. This could be new friends, new hobbies, anything really. It won't solve your problem outright but it can help. Easier said than done when you have depression, obviously but anything, no matter how minor will help.

Thank you. Depression, yes... I moved to a new country, started a new job, and still...

 

[Docc]

find a new someone

 

[Bardbarian]

I don't know. It never truly goes away. You can go years and be okay but one night those feelings will always come rushing back. I'm sorry

This is it. I don't think you ever stop loving a person. The way you love them changes, and overall those feelings become more manageable. But I still wake up with deep heartache after dreaming of a few people in particular.

 

[FadingSnowFake]

How much longer can this even go on, maybe the heart will just stop beating one day, broken a piece by piece, hopefully before the mind malfunctions completely.

 

[elenaboo25]

When my first boyfriend broke up with me, I thought I was getting a heart attack. I had chest pains and all. But I didn't call anybody for help, because I didn't care if I died.

 

[Ladyybugged]

im currently in the same boat as you, every single day is gut wrenching without him. it annoys me how fucking powerless i am over some things, so all i do now is just cry. it has been eating me alive on the inside and has ripped me apart more times than i can remember, but for some reason i keep trying to not let it show on the outside. to be honest, the only way i KNOW i'll be at peace with this and everything is after im dead, which i thankfully will be soon.

 

[FadingSnowFake]

im currently in the same boat as you, every single day is gut wrenching without him. it annoys me how fucking powerless i am over some things, so all i do now is just cry. it has been eating me alive on the inside and has ripped me apart more times than i can remember, but for some reason i keep trying to not let it show on the outside. to be honest, the only way i KNOW i'll at peace with this and everything is after im dead, which i thankfully will be soon.

Yeah, I'll never be at peace the way things are, I'm still holding onto a thread of hope for a future with him, just don't know how long I can stay sane. I refuse to cry, haven't shed tears since July last year. I'm afraid that if I do this will all be real, and it just cannot be real. I'm sorry for your situation, and feel your pain, it's not only emotional but physical too. Have you set your date?

When my first boyfriend broke up with me, I thought I was getting a heart attack. I had chest pains and all. But I didn't call anybody for help, because I didn't care if I died.

There is definitely a physical pain involved, like a tearing apart of whatever was joined inside, also affecting the heart. Maybe shock as well, similar to the reaction when someone dies. Did you overcome your grief and heart ache?

 

[ABadPerson]

I think my mind just suppresses it all hard until it explodes out in the form of severe mental breakdowns and worse attachment issues, I'm not sure how to cope with this. Maybe there's never really one but I hope you well anyways; sorry you are going through the same thing.

 

[Ladyybugged]

Have you set your date?

end of october.

 

[FadingSnowFake]

end of october.

So soon. Is this your main reason? Sending hugs.

 

[monetpompo]

Just when I think it's impossible to miss a person more, I wake up this morning, and I do. How do you get through another day knowing tomorrow is going to be worse without this person? How is it possible to just get emptier inside when you are already empty inside?

i want things to go back to the way they were. it isn't good enough to pretend that things are still the same between us when he has someone new. i feel like i'm not allowed to think about him the way i used to or mourn the former importance i had in his life. i burden his life by staying in it. sometimes i never want to like anyone again because i never want to miss anyone again. i want to sink down into my thoughts until i drown. i don't want someone new and i'm afraid anyone new will take advantage of how sad i am. some nights are harder than others. i have no advice. i feel envious of the way i used to be before i met him. everything feels ruined but i'm supposed to get over it.

 

[Greasyhair]

I cope, and distract myself. I eat, masturbate, listen to music, play games. Whatever can dull emptiness for moment, but I take little pride that I never started drinking or doing drugs. The small victories..

If nothing else works I seek oblivion in sleep, and hope when I wake up there is something in my mind.

 

[Bowerbird]

1. Disassociate
2. Create art
3. Sleep it off

 

[itsgone2]

I want them back more than anything

 

[FadingSnowFake]

1. Disassociate
2. Create art
3. Sleep it off

It helps you? Everything feels like a nightmare, with little control or energy, just trying to hold it together.

I want them back more than anything

Yip

 

[Dukey]

This person meant the world to me, and it breaks me knowing he couldn't care less if I bled out on the street.

It's been about five months now, and it's only getting worse. I can't let go. It feels like I'm losing my mind. It all happened so close together, first being abandoned by one of my closest friends, then by the person I loved the most.

I broke down completely. I was already so broken and desperate. I gave my whole heart twice, only to be discarded like a piece of trash, and now I'm the one made to look like the crazy one.

I begged, I apologized, I tried to make it right, but I'm never good enough. I feel so sad, angry, and full of resentment toward people. I don't see the point anymore. I just want the pain to stop. I feel so betrayed so heartbroken so used and angry I'm having these really fucked up fantasies, about killing myself with a gun in front of them and traumatizing them
Sending his nudes to all of his friends/family putting it online everywhere.

I know it's fucked up to even think like that and i feel like such a horrible person for having these thoughts.

Love will fuck you up more, than drugs ever will

 

[J&L383]

I don't know. It never truly goes away. You can go years and be okay but one night those feelings will always come rushing back. I'm sorry

I know this well.

 

[Kirkinator]

It's beautiful to feel this way about a person and that they had a great importance in your life. I wish I had someone I missed. I think the memories are worth much more than the overbearing loneliness of never having anyone to begin with.

 

[At The Bus Stop]

This is the first time I've felt like this, and this gave me a true feeling of what love was meant to feel like. I didn't have a bad upbringing, it was just very dysfunctional - and so I don't really understand what love is supposed to feel like. But, I guess this is what it is.

But, I didn't expect it to be this difficult. I still come home sometimes and expect to be greeted. I hear a knock outside the door, hoping that they will bring their bright smile back. I think over the weekend, I've now spent close to 24+ hours in bed. It's not healthy but I'm truly exhausted from doing nothing. It's isolating and despite having so much space here, it's incredibly claustrophobic.

I haven't yet found a way to find peace with it and I genuinely don't think I will. I have 0 interest in seeking another companion, because she was the one I wanted to marry. If there is no reconciliation for us down the line, If I'm still around - that'll be it for me I think. Not really liking the idea of having to learn someone completely new.

My immediate plans are to continue therapy, find ways to socialise (I moved 300 miles away from family and friends to live with her), and go to the gym. Failing to find motivation for that, or things get worse - I'll probably be buying a ticket for the next bus.

 

[FadingSnowFake]

It's beautiful to feel this way about a person and that they had a great importance in your life. I wish I had someone I missed. I think the memories are worth much more than the overbearing loneliness of never having anyone to begin with.

It is beautiful, thank you, and I understand how you feel. Before this person I was nothing, but I was never lonely then, even though I was always alone. When he finally broke down the walls around me and I let him in, he became my world. It is not possible to function in a world no more, like a puzzle missing a piece, it can never be complete.

I'm fortunate to have experienced this love. If not, I would have died without finding out what it really means to love someone, to be loved back and to discover what it is to miss someone. The memories are crippling, yet I cannot forget, the reminders of where I went wrong, and how I shouldn't have allowed it to happen, continue to haunt me. This kind of love can also be the killing kind, but I'm lucky to have found it. I hope that special memories are yet to be made for you, and that love will be kind to you.

 

[FadingSnowFake]

This is the first time I've felt like this, and this gave me a true feeling of what love was meant to feel like. I didn't have a bad upbringing, it was just very dysfunctional - and so I don't really understand what love is supposed to feel like. But, I guess this is what it is.

But, I didn't expect it to be this difficult. I still come home sometimes and expect to be greeted. I hear a knock outside the door, hoping that they will bring their bright smile back. I think over the weekend, I've now spent close to 24+ hours in bed. It's not healthy but I'm truly exhausted from doing nothing. It's isolating and despite having so much space here, it's incredibly claustrophobic.

I haven't yet found a way to find peace with it and I genuinely don't think I will. I have 0 interest in seeking another companion, because she was the one I wanted to marry. If there is no reconciliation for us down the line, If I'm still around - that'll be it for me I think. Not really liking the idea of having to learn someone completely new.

My immediate plans are to continue therapy, find ways to socialise (I moved 300 miles away from family and friends to live with her), and go to the gym. Failing to find motivation for that, or things get worse - I'll probably be buying a ticket for the next bus.

I feel you and same here... first time and dysfunctional family. And yes, not knowing what love was before this, I had no idea it would be like this to lose it, so devastating and unreal. Zero interest, life without him impossible. I've moved continents since I knew I would not be able to stay where he is no more, thought it would be the only way to focus and survive, but motivation is hard to find when empty.

I think it's so wrong when two people finally figure love out, to not be together in the end. I don't like the saying "it is what it is", because I feel I can never accept this, but I understand what you mean (my person uses that phrase too).

I'm sorry for your situation, and I truly hope that a reconciliation may be down the line for you.

 

[At The Bus Stop]

I feel you and same here... first time and dysfunctional family. And yes, not knowing what love was before this, I had no idea it would be like this to lose it, so devastating and unreal. Zero interest, life without him impossible. I've moved continents since I knew I would not be able to stay where he is no more, thought it would be the only way to focus and survive, but motivation is hard to find when empty.

I think it's so wrong when two people finally figure love out, to not be together in the end. I don't like the saying "it is what it is", because I feel I can never accept this, but I understand what you mean (my person uses that phrase too).

I'm sorry for your situation, and I truly hope that a reconciliation may be down the line for you.

I appreciate it. And I want to say likewise with yourself, but it sounds like with moving so far away it could be difficult. So, I hope you find your happiness in whatever medium you find it.

I'm very much an "it is what it is" person annoyingly, but this hit differently. It's always refreshing to hear when someone else experiences the same thing - doesn't make you feel like such an idiot I guess.. I was advised by my therapist today to speak with my GP to get some sort of "help" such as anti-depressants etc. I've never taken anything like it before (if they offer it), but I'm unsure if diluting my feelings is the right thing to do. It's the same reason I don't take pain medication - if it hurts, it's hurting for a reason and I should feel the pain to know whether I'm doing too much.

But it's an option.