badtzmaru
Member
- Jul 1, 2023
- 15
i often feel guilty about committing suicide because i have a lot of people that i care for and i don't want to sound narcisistic as if i am begging them to see me, to see what i have done and to see what they could have done about it. I don't want to teach anyone a lesson and i don't want anyone to feel sorry for me, i don't want people to overpay attention at it just because it's suicide, and i definetely don't want anyone else following my steps.
in the relationship i had in 2020, my partner broke up with me before attempting suicide and i didn't even knew. I thought they broke up with me to be with someone else, as they did. I thought they were so done that they just didn't wanted nothing to do with me, and if they had actually commited suicide then i would have lived in remorse until this day, and i would never forgive myself. I don't want to be this person, i don't want to drag anyone down and i really don't want to be a haunting face to someone, like my mother.
what the actual fuck do i do about it? i just want a break from it all but apparently i don't deserve a chill
in the relationship i had in 2020, my partner broke up with me before attempting suicide and i didn't even knew. I thought they broke up with me to be with someone else, as they did. I thought they were so done that they just didn't wanted nothing to do with me, and if they had actually commited suicide then i would have lived in remorse until this day, and i would never forgive myself. I don't want to be this person, i don't want to drag anyone down and i really don't want to be a haunting face to someone, like my mother.
what the actual fuck do i do about it? i just want a break from it all but apparently i don't deserve a chill
