Venting venting to others

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no one cares at all. all the people who've told me that i can come to them for anything have been useless.
i wish people would stop doing that. i get it, telling a depressed person that you won't be able to help them with their issues seems really rude in the moment; but isn't it better in the long run? i've been let down by everyone who has claimed that they'd be there for me no matter what, that they'd hear me out whenever i needed to vent, etc.
i would've preferred it if they never let me build that trust, it could have saved me so much confusion and disappointment. i don't doubt that most of these people truly meant it in the moment, and then i ended up exhausting them or something, but still. i've noticed that a lot of people say it just to say it, that's the worst.
i've attempted to vent to others irl a few times now, no one cares. i did it just now, but she was too occupied watching tv to even look in my direction for more than a moment. it's been like that forever, she has never cared about my struggles or suicidal ideation. no one in my family cares about my struggles, i don't think they ever truly cared. they're indifferent to all of it, but then treat me like a monster when i don't drop everything to coddle the person who caused a lot of my struggles. i don't understand why her bad day is more important than my constant self harm or any of my attempts, it's dumb.
i can only hope that everyone feels guilty after i ctb, but they won't. they'll whine about not having any signs, even though i've been direct about my intentions and struggles.

apologies for my poor grammar, i'm losing it rn

 

[Sadocan]

I feel you. People don't really care. A big part of my suicidality comes from that fact. Family, friends, you name it.

To me, a friend is somebody who is there for you, who hears about your experiences, be them good or bad. But my general experience is that this is not at all true. I've had people, who I called friends, who genuinely did not give a simple fuck about me. They knew that I was hurting. And guess what? That's the norm, I guess. On the topic of venting, specifically, I've seen a considerable ammount of people - even some mental health professionals - just outright stating that you shouldn't vent to other people at all, which, to me, is kind of absurd. (Obviously, I'm not talking about trauma dumping).

And that is something that made me feel even less of a person. Why do people act like this? I genuinely didn't understand why my "friends" did not care. I thought they were the problem. I thought that maybe they weren't actually my friends. But no. This is what friendship is. These are the rules. And, somehow, all of these people knew of this rule but me. Maybe that's just the average male friendship experience.