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ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

death will be my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
2,298
Dear ijustwishtodie, Myforevercharlie,not-tobe-the-answer and Suicidebydeath,

Thank you for caring enough to wonder where I am. It is honestly touching to know that someone cares.

I am going through a really rough few weeks where it feels like a battle between life and death. I have been on the site, bit to be honest haven't had the energy to write. Following a couple more overdoses over the past few weeks (did not reach out for medical support though) and a determination to stay alive for my children feels like an impossible dream. I even reached out to the community mental health team (therapy finished weeks ago) and agreed to be referred to the specialist trauma clinic (and apparently there is a wait of up to 2 years for this hospital)! And the mental health team are unwilling to offer more than another 8 therapy sessions (1 per month) unless I agree to work with their nurses and my GP (who let me down badly) - I refused as I am not going to lie and say that I will engage with other services when I wouldn't. A good friend of mine also died on Mother's day. Basically life has been crap. That feeling of utter isolation, rejection and loneliness really hit me after the last two overdoses. Yet my children need me and somehow I have to live on. Often I thought about trying to share how I felt on this forum and yet I feel like I depress other people when I talk about my feelings and that is the reason that even the NHS are unable to handle me. Hence I thought that I will just keep quiet.

But when I saw that someone here actually wondered where I was, I felt less alone. And Thank You for that.
I really liked your presence on this site and I was wondering for a while where you were. I just thought that you took a short break as I know people tend to do that but, as time passed, I got more and more worried so I decided to ask here. I'm sorry to hear that things have been extremely difficult for you. I wish I had the right things to say but I don't unfortunately. I just hope that you find peace soon from everything that's happening within your life
 
ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

death will be my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
2,298
Mods why is a lot of users names being crossed out? Am only seeing this now and I don't think it's on purpose...are we good?
In the past, there was a bug in where users who should be crossed out only appeared crossed out for the mods only and not for us. I got a theory that the additional influx of the appearance of the crossed out users only appeared because they fixed this bug which means that we can now see the people who should have been crossed out but didn't appear crossed out for us. At least I hope that happened
 
R

rozeske

Maybe I am the problem
Dec 2, 2023
2,411
In the past, there was a bug in where users who should be crossed out only appeared crossed out for the mods only and not for us. I got a theory that the additional influx of the appearance of the crossed out users only appeared because they fixed this bug which means that we can now see the people who should have been crossed out but didn't appear crossed out for us. At least I hope that happened
No no it's showing recent members who are currently active crossed out. I think they can still access their accounts as there comments were as recent as 1 or 2 minutes ago. It's a lot of them and kind of shocking to see active members crossed out but atleast it's a relief they can still access their accounts. Am not sure if they can see their names crossed out....is mine? ๐Ÿ˜…
 
ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

death will be my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
2,298
No no it's showing recent members who are currently active crossed out. I think they can still access their accounts as there comments were as recent as 1 or 2 minutes ago. It's a lot of them and kind of shocking to see active members crossed out but atleast it's a relief they can still access their accounts. Am not sure if they can see their names crossed out....is mine? ๐Ÿ˜…
Okay, wait, you have a point. I'm getting reaction notifications from users who appear crossed out. This is kinda freaky. It's like this site has ghosts now lol. Either way, no, your username isn't crossed out from my end. Though what about my username? Perhaps I was a ghost all this time
 
not-2-b-the-answer

not-2-b-the-answer

Archangel
Mar 23, 2018
7,851
No no it's showing recent members who are currently active crossed out. I think they can still access their accounts as there comments were as recent as 1 or 2 minutes ago. It's a lot of them and kind of shocking to see active members crossed out but atleast it's a relief they can still access their accounts. Am not sure if they can see their names crossed out....is mine? ๐Ÿ˜…
Your name is fine. ๐Ÿ˜‰
Okay, wait, you have a point. I'm getting reaction notifications from users who appear crossed out. This is kinda freaky. It's like this site has ghosts now lol. Either way, no, your username isn't crossed out from my end. Though what about my username? Perhaps I was a ghost all this time
You are good as well. ... I wish I were a ghost. ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: rozeske
ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

death will be my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
2,298
The discussion pages are looking like party of the living dead. I kinda feel left out of the cool kids club :)
Same here. I wish that my username was crossed out too (for the mods reading this, don't take it literally please... I like this site lol). There was even a thread talking about the crossed out users with even more crossed out users joining in. It sure feels like a party
 
A

a.fool

Student
Jun 27, 2023
129
Dear ijustwishtodie, Myforevercharlie,not-tobe-the-answer and Suicidebydeath,

Thank you for caring enough to wonder where I am. It is honestly touching to know that someone cares.

I am going through a really rough few weeks where it feels like a battle between life and death. I have been on the site, bit to be honest haven't had the energy to write. Following a couple more overdoses over the past few weeks (did not reach out for medical support though) and a determination to stay alive for my children feels like an impossible dream. I even reached out to the community mental health team (therapy finished weeks ago) and agreed to be referred to the specialist trauma clinic (and apparently there is a wait of up to 2 years for this hospital)! And the mental health team are unwilling to offer more than another 8 therapy sessions (1 per month) unless I agree to work with their nurses and my GP (who let me down badly) - I refused as I am not going to lie and say that I will engage with other services when I wouldn't. A good friend of mine also died on Mother's day. Basically life has been crap. That feeling of utter isolation, rejection and loneliness really hit me after the last two overdoses. Yet my children need me and somehow I have to live on. Often I thought about trying to share how I felt on this forum and yet I feel like I depress other people when I talk about my feelings and that is the reason that even the NHS are unable to handle me. Hence I thought that I will just keep quiet.

But when I saw that someone here actually wondered where I was, I felt less alone. And Thank You for that.
Just know that I care, I care a lot.
Here's a hug ๐Ÿซ‚
 
MeltingBrain

MeltingBrain

Mage
May 29, 2023
550
I can't remember the username of this person I am thinking of but

what happened to the person with the pixelated ice cube gif as a profile picture, who would post polls a lot
Hey, That's me ! I have been busy with work a lot so I login sparsely . I have put the continuation of polls in freezer right now but I still plan to post them going forward when I get more time . As for my physical health things are not looking good, I still have difficulty when I move around medium range distances (hope I had better news on this) .
Thank you for remembering me :)
 
4.I.2.Must.Die

4.I.2.Must.Die

Up with life I cannot put ๐Ÿ™… โœ‹ Where's the exit ๐Ÿ”š
Nov 8, 2023
1,796
Where is ๐Ÿ‘๏ธ๐Ÿ‘ƒ๐Ÿ‘๏ธ now?
His new account is blocked.
P.S ๐Ÿ‘๏ธ๐Ÿ‘ƒ๐Ÿ‘๏ธ if you are reading my message, please write in Private messages.
Damn, I thought I was the only one with emojis in my username, this shouldn't be allowed like this though as it's too difficult to reference them and you can't tag thwm using the @ sign either.
 
Silent_cries

Silent_cries

I wish I could delete my trauma...
Aug 10, 2021
783
Does anyone know if Persephone is dead? Has it been confirmed yet? Last time I heard from her she was dying from natural causes so I've been wondering. I rly hope so bc she didn't deserve the suffering she went through. I hated seeing how much pain she was in, it was horrible! No one deserves that! Please tell me she finally got the peace she so desperately needed and deserved! Pls!
No one deserve to suffer like that, istg if only pro-lifers realized what people have to endure...
 

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