Venting thought life was getting a bit better

[picklemeow]

I was getting better, well a little. small steps at a time I guess, but it all went downhill. I am already planning to see if I can get my hands on rope, or anything really. I will have a chance, next week to end it with a gun. I was talking to someone I had liked for a lot of time, they were my first love, but I got led on. it sucks really and I should have expected it, but they claimed they really liked me only to choose someone else because I was always too shy to talk to them in real life (anxiety SUCKS) I've been waiting to get a new therapist, psychiatrist etc, but I don't think I'll make it till then. everyone is now just pitying me and it sucks. I had my doubts, so I'm not as devastated to have found that out. but I was still planning to ctb anyways, I'll see if I can get my hands on the gun. if I can't ill just find a bridge or something to overdose, and hope I never wake up. hopefully

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry you have to suffer like that, existence really is too dreadful and cruel. But anyway best wishes.