Story Drowning in my thoughts

[dahliadreamscape444]

Just got finished writing this all out. It's a bit of a sloppy vent from just some pent up emotions these past few days. I hope to make more actual substantial posts soon. Nostalgia is a silent killer, I feel like.

For the past few days it's been getting so much worse. I'm so numb and I'm overwhelmed with all of my regrets and loneliness.

I feel like I've wasted my whole life. I'm 26 now and I feel like it's too cringy for me to go to anime conventions or start into cosplay again or the creative sphere that I used to be passionate about. I feel like I'm past my prime to be going out clubbing and getting drunk and having a good time. I missed the opportunity to join a sorority and secure friends for life. I can't start watching new shows again because I feel like I'm too old to still be a fan, or even if I was I wouldn't be able to interact with anyone about it and then all the emotions from being moved by something have no where to go and I'm reminded again of my loneliness. Every post I see on social media is from someone I used to consider a close friend getting married and seeing all of the invitees being people I know too just sucks. I just feel like I'm the only one getting left behind and everyone else has someone they can talk to consistently, or has someone that knows every little detail about them. I don't.

My brain has been hyper focusing on how lonely I am. I wake up and I start crying thinking about how I have no one to talk to. I'll be forgotten about completely when I die. Im hoping before that that I can try to contribute and make an impact here somehow, to finally find a community that I can support and that can support me back. So that when I'm gone I'll have someone that says they actually enjoyed having me around, or that I had some sort of impact on them. Thank you to everyone who commented on my introductory post. I know that the purpose of this forum isn't really to make friends, but I feel like the prospect of making connections here is also helping me from spiraling too much harder.

♡Dahlia

 

[MeSauce]

Just got finished writing this all out. It's a bit of a sloppy vent from just some pent up emotions these past few days. I hope to make more actual substantial posts soon. Nostalgia is a silent killer, I feel like.

For the past few days it's been getting so much worse. I'm so numb and I'm overwhelmed with all of my regrets and loneliness.

I feel like I've wasted my whole life. I'm 26 now and I feel like it's too cringy for me to go to anime conventions or start into cosplay again or the creative sphere that I used to be passionate about. I feel like I'm past my prime to be going out clubbing and getting drunk and having a good time. I missed the opportunity to join a sorority and secure friends for life. I can't start watching new shows again because I feel like I'm too old to still be a fan, or even if I was I wouldn't be able to interact with anyone about it and then all the emotions from being moved by something have no where to go and I'm reminded again of my loneliness. Every post I see on social media is from someone I used to consider a close friend getting married and seeing all of the invitees being people I know too just sucks. I just feel like I'm the only one getting left behind and everyone else has someone they can talk to consistently, or has someone that knows every little detail about them. I don't.

My brain has been hyper focusing on how lonely I am. I wake up and I start crying thinking about how I have no one to talk to. I'll be forgotten about completely when I die. Im hoping before that that I can try to contribute and make an impact here somehow, to finally find a community that I can support and that can support me back. So that when I'm gone I'll have someone that says they actually enjoyed having me around, or that I had some sort of impact on them. Thank you to everyone who commented on my introductory post. I know that the purpose of this forum isn't really to make friends, but I feel like the prospect of making connections here is also helping me from spiraling too much harder.

♡Dahlia

Hi Dahlia I like your pfp, very cool (✿◠‿◠) I've felt some of the things you are feeling, it sucks Do you have an anime that really moved you? You don't have to answer if you don't feel like talking about it, i just wanted you to know somebody read what you wrote and was interested

 

[ctb_warrior]

Just got finished writing this all out. It's a bit of a sloppy vent from just some pent up emotions these past few days. I hope to make more actual substantial posts soon. Nostalgia is a silent killer, I feel like.

For the past few days it's been getting so much worse. I'm so numb and I'm overwhelmed with all of my regrets and loneliness.

I feel like I've wasted my whole life. I'm 26 now and I feel like it's too cringy for me to go to anime conventions or start into cosplay again or the creative sphere that I used to be passionate about. I feel like I'm past my prime to be going out clubbing and getting drunk and having a good time. I missed the opportunity to join a sorority and secure friends for life. I can't start watching new shows again because I feel like I'm too old to still be a fan, or even if I was I wouldn't be able to interact with anyone about it and then all the emotions from being moved by something have no where to go and I'm reminded again of my loneliness. Every post I see on social media is from someone I used to consider a close friend getting married and seeing all of the invitees being people I know too just sucks. I just feel like I'm the only one getting left behind and everyone else has someone they can talk to consistently, or has someone that knows every little detail about them. I don't.

My brain has been hyper focusing on how lonely I am. I wake up and I start crying thinking about how I have no one to talk to. I'll be forgotten about completely when I die. Im hoping before that that I can try to contribute and make an impact here somehow, to finally find a community that I can support and that can support me back. So that when I'm gone I'll have someone that says they actually enjoyed having me around, or that I had some sort of impact on them. Thank you to everyone who commented on my introductory post. I know that the purpose of this forum isn't really to make friends, but I feel like the prospect of making connections here is also helping me from spiraling too much harder.

♡Dahlia

Hi Dahlia,
A very warm welcome to SaSu
It's sad to see that life has brought you here.
But don't worry, you are home.
This community is full of loving and supportive people who are there for you to listen to you without any judgement. I come to SaSu whenever I'm bent upon doing CTB, but every time the love and support that I get actually stops me from going paranoid and thinking of CTB. I have become much calmer now. Last week, I was in extreme distress.
And feel free to make friends here. I have made a few friends in just a week's time. And it's lovely to talk to them.
So, in this community, you are not alone.
Everyone's here to listen to you, to support you.
God bless you
Have a lovely stay here on SaSu
And a lil piece of advice for a happy life: follow your heart, do what it loves to do. Life's always gonna have something or the other that pisses us off, so while we are here on this planet, why not listen to the heart that keeps us alive and keeps us sensitive and warm.