Going outside makes me feel unbelievably lonely

[burninghill]

I never feel worse than when I go outside, I get this overwhelming sense of grief and loss. I look at people and I wish I was like them, I want to sob because their lives seem so easy from an outside perspective and I wish I could have that too.

I get this deep rooted feeling that everything is going to end soon and like everybody else is a part of something that I'm not. It's like I'm already dead and I'm just wandering about places that I used to know.

 

[jesteroutofwork]

i understand you op :(
I often feel that way too, it's almost like the entire world keeps on going without you. It's gut wrenching

 

[3rdworldsadness]

Same!!! I prefer my tiny room it feels safe here I don't feel lonely too. But when I step outside it's like why I don't have a supportive person?! Whyyy?!!!!

 

[Pvnie]

I feel like a disconnected thing or some kind of alien.

 

[selsel]

I totally understand and relate to that feeling oh my god, but what helps me is knowing that they also have lots of shit in their lives, and to them i probably look extremely happy and they think "omg i wish i had her life"

 

[Agon321]

Each of these people has their own story and creates their own illusion. When I'm outside, I feel depressed, but for a different reason. I see people being crushed by reality every day.

 

[valar_morghulis21]

I never feel worse than when I go outside, I get this overwhelming sense of grief and loss. I look at people and I wish I was like them, I want to sob because their lives seem so easy from an outside perspective and I wish I could have that too.

I get this deep rooted feeling that everything is going to end soon and like everybody else is a part of something that I'm not. It's like I'm already dead and I'm just wandering about places that I used to know.

Truly. I like to dissociate at a coffee shop alone for hours

 

[GodzillasBiggestFan]

i feel this too. i feel disconnected and not enough. i feel really bad anxiety. and afterwards i feel guilt that going for a walk doesnt fix my mental health like everyone says it will.

 

[westernromanpatriot]

mood, i barely go outside anymore so i wont get sad

 

[eggsausagerice]

one of the reasons i stopped attending college is because i couldn't stand people being happier than me when i felt extremely miserable and i was worried about lashing out in public. most days i still feel irritated when i'm around friend groups, couples, or families, because they aren't alone. and when i'm with people i'm only surface level friends with i think about how they don't wake up every morning wishing they were dead. it's hard to not be hyperaware of how alone i feel when almost everything reminds me that i'm isolated. i just don't want to be around people most days. i don't want to have to act like i'm happy in front of others when i'm not. i wish i knew how to socialize, because i still feel people are coming up to me in public to bully me and not because they actually want to say something nice or talk to me briefly. i always seem to look sad or scared when people talk to me because i forget that i exist. i feel like i'm always going to instinctively think about how alone i am when i'm around people that have friends that talk to them or have a partner. i see couples wherever i go, but there were so many in college i felt like a lonely freak. i can't understand how people can have so many friends in their life while most people get bored of me immediately.

 

[VirtualWorldIsBette]

My dad drags me to the gym some time. That's really the only "third place" I go to. I hate it so much. I hate seeing people work out and talk with their friends or partner. It makes me so depressed seeing other young people like myself happy in this life.

 

[FinalDestination]

This describes my situation to a T. Being outside greatly highlights my own isolation and my inability to connect to anyone, like I'm always watching from the outside and I'll feel so pathetic. Like a secret everyone knows that I was never in on