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@foreverbroken28 , I have never been in love so I can't say I understand, but that was just heartbreaking to read. I wish there was some way of killing the pain without killing the patient.
(Just letting out what I can't say to him, directly.)
~ ~ ~
The thought of my heart stopping is scary but the idea of living without you is what makes my heart stop.
I love you so much. You are the most beautiful man on this planet.
To know that you are out there and that we are not in each other's lives, at least not even friends is killing me are far beyond what I'm able to take.
I'm sorry to you. I wish I was normal. I love you. If I was normal, I would have never messed up our friendship.
I'm not normal and my emotions are not normal and I love you with every fiber of my being.
I am sorry for everything I've ever done to offend you. I love you so so much, beautiful sweetheart.
I did the income taxes!! I still have to do the income affidavit, but my gut hurts so I'm taking a break. My MMJ doc never got back to me from Thursday, who knows when I'll be able to get any more of the stuff.
I find money intimidating. I find the government intimidating, I have five very intimidating forms, dealing with both money and the government, to fill out. I did four out of the five! Yay, me! But the fifth was the one that precipitated a panic attack a couple of weeks ago. My therapist phoned today and didn't seem to understand why I'm reluctant to work on that one.
I picked it up today, and for a few minutes I couldn't find one of the other forms I need to work from. I did find the missing one before long, but in just those few minutes my gut started churning. So now I'm procrastinating online again.
Reactions:
not-2-b-the-answer, Carina and Brick In The Wall
I find money intimidating. I find the government intimidating, I have five very intimidating forms, dealing with both money and the government, to fill out. I did four out of the five! Yay, me! But the fifth was the one that precipitated a panic attack a couple of weeks ago. My therapist phoned today and didn't seem to understand why I'm reluctant to work on that one.
I picked it up today, and for a few minutes I couldn't find one of the other forms I need to work from. I did find the missing one before long, but in just those few minutes my gut started churning. So now I'm procrastinating online again.
I did the fifth intimidating form! They're all done! But it's too late in the day to get them copied now, still have to copy and mail, tomorrow I guess. And then I need to see about getting the MMJ. My gut hurts.
(Just letting out what I can't say to him, directly.)
~ ~ ~
The thought of my heart stopping is scary but the idea of living without you is what makes my heart stop.
I love you so much. You are the most beautiful man on this planet.
To know that you are out there and that we are not in each other's lives, at least not even friends is killing me are far beyond what I'm able to take.
I'm sorry to you. I wish I was normal. I love you. If I was normal, I would have never messed up our friendship.
I'm not normal and my emotions are not normal and I love you with every fiber of my being.
I am sorry for everything I've ever done to offend you. I love you so so much, beautiful sweetheart.
beautiful words, I'd love to say this to my ex-partner.
I'd do anything to change how I was/am and be back to normal again with him
everyday I cry, sometimes I don't wash for days (disgusting I know) I see no reason to do anything without him, I've forgot who I am without him.
I'd do anything to have him back. I get horrible visions of him with someone else.
even if I sent something like what you said to him, he wouldn't listen, I've lost one of the best people in my life.
So its been a sort of ritual to post here every thousandth post. This is #8,000 and I dunno if it's a blessing or a curse. But I'm still here and grateful for this community, all the love, and support I've received since I joined.
Reactions:
Fragile, omoidarui and not-2-b-the-answer
true, i was just surprised that didn't make it. unless.... oh they changed board software... like who wants to share on facebook? and the bottom links.
might just make it harder for some to go here withtout getting caught. but maybe they're getting it back
Miss y'all.
Somehow I've been too depressed to even open the browser on my phone. I've lurked occasionally. Hope everyone is doing okay. I'm spiraling bad.
Reactions:
not-2-b-the-answer, Brick In The Wall and Lunarhour
true, i was just surprised that didn't make it. unless.... oh they changed board software... like who wants to share on facebook? and the bottom links.
might just make it harder for some to go here withtout getting caught. but maybe they're getting it back
Miss y'all.
Somehow I've been too depressed to even open the browser on my phone. I've lurked occasionally. Hope everyone is doing okay. I'm spiraling bad.
Hahaha, I might! But in all honesty that FB share link on there freaks me the fuck out. I feel like one day I'm going to hit it on accident or something without even realizing.
Hahaha, I might! But in all honesty that FB share link on there freaks me the fuck out. I feel like one day I'm going to hit it on accident or something without even realizing.
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