The Official 2020 Everything But The Kitchen Sink Post

[Sensei]

Thanks for letting us know. It looks like she needed a little encouragement.

If she needs encouragement, she's not ready. Sometimes I just want to leave this place and never return.

 

[MysticPerception]

View attachment 25112

2 foot marathon here I come! To think for years I thought I'm too lazy to ever wake up early enough and walk a marathon. Well turns out I was wrong.

If she needs encouragement, she's not ready. Sometimes I just want to leave this place and never return.

I respectfully disagree. SI is unfair and stacks the deck against everyone who tries to leave this life early. So I see nothing wrong with giving the someone hesitating a reassurance and a logical point of view as an advantage to fight back against an unfair battle. I don't want to push someone into ctb nor do I want them to do it if they really shouldn't or have serious doubts. But if someone is shaking out of fear when they're about to do it then that's just a natural reaction that they shouldn't have to put up with.

 

[Carina]

If she needs encouragement, she's not ready. Sometimes I just want to leave this place and never return.

Only comment was about hands shaking pouring it (SN) out... but she stopped really responding to things during that really too

 

[BlueWidow]

Wow, I'm sorry to hear about their illnesses and that they didn't get treatment (if they wanted to live, if not then I understand). Sometimes it's hard for religious people to admit to being suicidal or having ideations, which is unfortunate. I hate that there is such a stigma to it all. Anyway, I also see it as a horrific way to go. If I ever get a terminal illness then I know it'll be my time at some point shortly after.

I watched my mom smoke herself to death after being diagnosed with emphysema and COPD, and watched her many suicide attempts and cries for help. I still don't understand it all, I just know that my mother was very mentally ill and sick from smoking and wouldn't quit. I don't see why she would continue to smoke, but I guess if she was suicidal and unhappy then why not? I don't fully understand it yet because of all the trauma she has caused in my life, but I think as a pro choice adult I kind of do.

My dad was a heavy smoker and a heavy drinker and he died from emphysema. I spent most of my teen years taking care of him. That's another horrible way to go. My dad was at least a slight bit more proactive than the rest of my family though. From what I'm told, when I was in the psych ward and when I spent a year in a residential treatment center away from him, he apparently slept every night with a loaded gun ready to fire under his pillow hoping that he would turn the wrong way and it would go off without him having to actually pull the trigger. I guess to his mind that way it would look like an accident even though he loaded the gun and put it under his pillow, or maybe he thought if it went off then it was God's will that he die and if it didn't go off it was God's will that he live to die of something else. Unfortunately (or fortunately?) for him, it never went off and he had to suffer through emphysema.
The whole thing is terrible. There's just no good way to die. I suspect even the people who supposedly die in their sleep may struggle, even if nobody notices it.

 

[Sensei]

I respectfully disagree. SI is unfair and stacks the deck against everyone who tries to leave this life early. So I see nothing wrong with giving the someone hesitating a reassurance and a logical point of view as an advantage to fight back against an unfair battle. I don't want to push someone into ctb nor do I want them to do it if they really shouldn't or have serious doubts. But if someone is shaking out of fear when they're about to do it then that's just a natural reaction that they shouldn't have to put up with.

How can you know for certain that it was only blind survival instinct? Are you a telepath?

 

[MysticPerception]

How can you know for certain that it was only blind survival instinct? Are you a telepath?

Of course not. I only assumed based on what she herself posted. If she said something more along the lines of she was having doubts then I would say she should probably think about waiting or maybe it's not time for her yet. I don't just swing one way or the other I make a case by case basis based on what the person said.

I had to go afk while making this post and after catching up with the thread NOW I would say she shouldn't do it and should wait. Like I said case by case.

 

[cosmicpixiedust]

What just happened? I..what..? Poor girl

 

[MysticPerception]

Poor girl, her inbox is about to get flooded. I'm not going to say anything further to her though it's her choice but she's really forcing it if all it takes is a person saying look at your cat. Hopefully she is content with her decision no matter what it ends up being.

 

[cosmicpixiedust]

She was the one who locked the thread, right?

 

[BlueWidow]

Poor girl, her inbox is about to get flooded. I'm not going to say anything further to her though it's her choice but she's really forcing it if all it takes is a person saying look at your cat. Hopefully she is content with her decision no matter what it ends up being.

I feel bad for her. I always hope the person is strong enough to make their own choice and I try not to say anything to influence them one way or another. It did seem that she was very uncertain about everything though.
I feel bad that anyone has to leave this world with that kind of uncertainty.
I know it's almost impossible to know what you will feel when that moment actually arrives. You may have all the resolve in the world and think you are 100% ready, and then the moment arrives and you suddenly realize you are nowhere near ready.
I'm hoping she ends up okay, whatever happens.

 

[Morphinekiss]

She was the one who locked the thread, right?

Either that or we're all about to get warning for pro-life propagandizing (is that a word?)

 

[cosmicpixiedust]

I feel bad for her. I always hope the person is strong enough to make their own choice and I try not to say anything to influence them one way or another. It did seem that she was very uncertain about everything though.
I feel bad that anyone has to leave this world with that kind of uncertainty.
I know it's almost impossible to know what you will feel when that moment actually arrives. You may have all the resolve in the world and think you are 100% ready, and then the moment arrives and you suddenly realize you are nowhere near ready.
I'm hoping she ends up okay, whatever happens.

Yeah, that was definitely more than just SI. I hope she makes the right choice, whatever that is. I just hated seeing her flip flopping like that, one minute she wasn't sure and the next she was. It hurt to watch her suffer like that.

 

[MysticPerception]

She was the one who locked the thread, right?

I think so. Based on that last post she made it seems like it.

I feel bad for her. I always hope the person is strong enough to make their own choice and I try not to say anything to influence them one way or another. It did seem that she was very uncertain about everything though.
I feel bad that anyone has to leave this world with that kind of uncertainty.
I know it's almost impossible to know what you will feel when that moment actually arrives. You may have all the resolve in the world and think you are 100% ready, and then the moment arrives and you suddenly realize you are nowhere near ready.
I'm hoping she ends up okay, whatever happens.

Yeah I feel pretty much the same. Usually I'm hands off and want people to make their own choice so I only make a single comment regarding what I think and hope that they make the right choice for them and find peace. It sucks stepping up to the plate and finding out you don't have what it takes but I know the feeling well. In those cases though I talked myself down but not everyone can do that. Hopefully she doesn't panic after taking it if she did in the end.

Edit: I just checked the thread, she drank it all. Well at least she made her choice on her own terms.

 

[cosmicpixiedust]

Either that or we're all about to get warning for pro-life propagandizing (is that a word?)

I originally thought we might have been about to get that, but then I read her post.
She unlocked it and just drank the SN
I hope she finds peace, I really do

 

[Squiddy]

Damn college application fees are expensive and add up. I'm applying to one that costs $70

 

[MysticPerception]

Damn college application fees are expensive and add up. I'm applying to one that costs $70

I hate how much it costs just to apply at all. It's so stupid the way it's set up.

 

[Jean4]

I hate how much it costs just to apply at all. It's so stupid the way it's set up.

Anyway to get money ;)

I hate how much it costs just to apply at all. It's so stupid the way it's set up.

But I am proud of you for doing it. I remember the essay you had to write. Ugh.

 

[Squiddy]

I hate how much it costs just to apply at all. It's so stupid the way it's set up.

It should be free

Anyway to get money ;)

But I am proud of you for doing it. I remember the essay you had to write. Ugh.

Yup

 

[cosmicpixiedust]

Clocking in, talk to you guys later

 

[Jean4]

Clocking in, talk to you guys later

Night! I hope you will sleep

 

[MysticPerception]

Clocking in, talk to you guys later

Good night, hope you sleep well and wake up feeling good.

 

[Squiddy]

Clocking in, talk to you guys later

Night

 

[Morphinekiss]

Damn college application fees are expensive and add up. I'm applying to one that costs $70

Yep. I used to pay for my student's application fees if I knew they were struggling. Probably why I had almost no savings when I quit teaching

 

[Squiddy]

Yep. I used to pay for my student's application fees if I knew they were struggling. Probably why I had almost no savings when I quit teaching

Too bad I'm not eligible to get the fee waived

 

[BlueWidow]

Yep. I used to pay for my student's application fees if I knew they were struggling. Probably why I had almost no savings when I quit teaching

You were obviously one of the good teachers who cared about the students.

And now, The inevitable question. . . . What did you teach?

 

[Morphinekiss]

Fee waiving criteria is so fucked. Your parent(s) could make just enough money to be above the line, but they don't take into account the fact that money covers rent, groceries, medical, etc. One of the reasons I left education. And don't get me started on FAFSA or hardship loans. I'll stop before I get on my soapbox.

 

[Carina]

I only applied to 2 colleges when I did... I had a 'let fate decide' with it. and wasn't about to pay fees for tons of places for no reason!

 

[Morphinekiss]

You were obviously one of the good teachers who cared about the students.

And now, The inevitable question. . . . What did you teach?

English lit and creative writing. I loved my students and job. It's funny because they have no idea how many times they stopped me from blowing my brains out in my car in the parking lot.

 

[Squiddy]

I think I'll just apply to 3-5 colleges in order to save money. It's a shame that I can't apply to more due to costs

 

[MysticPerception]

I think I'll just apply to 3-5 colleges in order to save money. It's a shame that I can't apply to more due to costs

If it makes you feel a little better I was only able to apply for one ever. So at least you get a choice if multiple accept you in the end. I'd say 3-5 is plenty so no reason to feel bad about it really, you're doing what you can.