Part of me is really wanting to clean (i.e. throw away everything that has no meaning to me, that might not have any meaning to others) just so there's nothing really to go through i the future...
Part realizes it will look really suspicious if I do that, and I will be questioned. Even if the first response is 'about time!' because then it will be 'wait... why are you doing this now?....'
I just so casually lied to a friend of sorts last night it's scary how natural it was.... like way too natural. Like I can lie as easily as breathing. Well, when it involves how I"m doing lol. Because definitely do not want questions lol.