Venting so good at faking it it makes me upset

[comeoutandhauntme]

i've vented abt this on here before but i'm just so good at faking being happy and okay to everyone that it almost makes me mad lmao, like some secret awful part of me just wishes someone would somehow see past me and realize i'm not okay. but then again i purposely put up so many walls to make sure that doesn't happen, and any time someone DOES check on me or wonder if im okay, i lie straight through my teeth and say that i'm fine. so ig idek what i want LMAO

 

[FinalDestination]

I'm the exact same way. Wanting to be seen but I've been lyjng so long I wouldn't know how. Plus I wouldn't want to forfeit my current freedom and be forcefully sent away or constantly watched over lol. So maybe this way isn't so bad ha

 

[yotaka]

I was just thinking about this exact thing. I think there's a sort of middle ground where we're definitely not ok, but our suffering isn't crippling, so people don't see it. I almost think it would be nice to go catatonic or have a complete mental breakdown; at least that way people wouldn't expect you to just keep going with daily life...

Kind of feels like this

 

[comeoutandhauntme]

I'm the exact same way. Wanting to be seen but I've been lyjng so long I wouldn't know how. Plus I wouldn't want to forfeit my current freedom and be forcefully sent away or constantly watched over lol. So maybe this way isn't so bad ha

yes this is my exact issue lol, like i would rather not be hovered over or sent away to some psych ward just bc someone figures out im suicidal no thank u!!

I was just thinking about this exact thing. I think there's a sort of middle ground where we're definitely not ok, but our suffering isn't crippling, so people don't see it. I almost think it would be nice to go catatonic or have a complete mental breakdown; at least that way people wouldn't expect you to just keep going with daily life...

Kind of feels like this

nah fr, the way i fantasize abt absolutely losing it in front of someone just to feel seen and comforted is crazy. but i'm able to present so normally in my day to day life, at my worst i just come off tired and that's it

 

[yotaka]

nah fr, the way i fantasize abt absolutely losing it in front of someone just to feel seen and comforted is crazy. but i'm able to present so normally in my day to day life, at my worst i just come off tired and that's it

I won't ever do it, but I think it would be hilarious when one of my coworkers asks how it's going to respond with, "I think about killing myself every day." Calm tone, casual inflection, but instead of lying and saying I'm great I would tell the truth. I wonder what they would do

 

[♡Sayori_Kinnie♡]

Type shit
Real unfortunately