Venting life is so unfulfilling.

[Kokonoe]

title.
my whole life feels like just killing time. everything i do or could do offers no real satisfaction or change or purpose in life. it's always just something to do. even things i want really badly for a long time, once i get them, i realize it's unfulfilling, too. even things i don't have i know will be like that. like if somehow i ever got a partner, it would be nice to not be alone i guess, but it changes next to nothing. i still have no purpose in life. i just have someone to kill time with. it's still the same thing.
i got started thinking about this because i've been trying to take classes again as a way to just have something to do. specifically art classes, bc it's one of the few things i actually enjoy. i haven't done anything college related in 5 or 6 years, the whole process has been confusing to me and it makes me feel like an idiot. i've been so depressed that i haven't really even be able to keep up with necessary tasks, let alone stuff like applying for college classes and all the steps that go into that. just making sure i eat one thing a day already takes everything out of me..
so naturally the classes start to fill up, and i realized i'm probably going to miss my chance for this fall semester. i'll likely have to wait until next year. a whole 6 months with nothing to do with myself was a horrifying thought. but i realized it really doesn't matter. these art classes aren't important or fulfilling in any way. it's just a way to kill time. whether it happens in a month or 7 months, it doesn't really matter.
why is everything in life so unfulfilling. why does everything just boil down to "a way to pass the time". i wish life wasn't so empty and meaningless. i don't want to live life at all.

 

[bipolar22]

Yes. Univer does not care how you feel. Lige is competition. Ever living thin has to absorb and like another organism to survive. Its like battlebits in an arean eit consciousness. Couse it suck. Nothing more till be sad

 

[_Gollum_]

The pessimist philosopher Thomas Ligotti calls life "malignantly useless," which I think is an accurate description.

 

[delinquentsandwich]

life has always felt unfulfilling
I distract myself with one thing until I get bored or tired of it then I just move onto the next
never motivated to stay with anything

 

[gentarouhongou]

Yeah, fulfilment is something I'm jealous of. Or "feeling" to be exact. I wish I could interact or experience life, feel it like others do. I've never understood how people do, really. Dunno if I articulated my thoughts correctly there

 

[Manfrotto99]

You really need money to have a fulfilling life - new experiences and choices in life often equate to fulfilment- that's why people go on holidays, get married, have children, change jobs, take up new hobbies, buy a new house, new car, change residence ...its the same old existence that gets stale- same thing day in and out that leads to unfullillment...that usually comes with having no money and very little choices in life...or poor health and being physically or mentally unable to experience new things.