Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you šŸ•Æļø I'm de-stressing
Jul 1, 2020
6,917
i wish i knew what happened yesterday.
i dont know if it was food, weed or meds

i heavily under-eat and have lactose intolerance. i ate a "normal" amount (not the advised 2000, but 500-1000 probably. closer to normal) and i had chocolate.
i also had weed, which typically isnt a problem. but i had joint after joint with gummies on top. "oh im fine" has another

as the day went by i felt sicker and sicker
i had 2 (maybe 3) pepcid pills for my upset stomach. i had my typical 1 buspar in the morning but then i had 2 in the afternoon because i was upset that my bf wasnt only going out, but was going out all night. (im fucking glad they kicked me out. "youre leaving him in bed by himself" and he would have done the same fucking thing to me. i can just hear it "im sorry honey but i dont have a choice, i have to be out all night. i still love you though" doesnt make me hurt any less and you know it!)

i went off on a bit of a tangent oops lol

anyway, yeah, i had a shitty day yesterday. for probably all the reasons listed above just got sicker until i just passed out/went to sleep. it would be cool to live in the hospital when stuff like that is going on so you can know the exact chemical reactions happening in your body.
why do i have to just have a bad headache and feel sick....why cant something just kill me. (wasnt trying to kill myself with yesterdays actions (if i was then i would have taken the sleeping pill i found a bit ago. and all of my meds not just 3) but i still wish something more wrong would have happened inside of me to cause it...)
 

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