She cheated on me

[oiaocircular]

My girlfriend cheated on me and it made me so miserable I went back to cutting myself. Now I don't know what to say to her when she asks about it neither what I should do regarding our relationship. Any advice?

 

[Rayzieka]

I think you should decide if you want to be with someone capable of cheating and if it's worth the emotional damage.
Personally, I don't think it is.

 

[framedfirefly]

My girlfriend cheated on me and it made me so miserable I went back to cutting myself. Now I don't know what to say to her when she asks about it neither what I should do regarding our relationship. Any advice?

If you get to the point of relapse because of a partners' actions in any relationship, then you should run from said relationship as fast as you can. I wish you luck in your future endeavors! <3

 

[Rational man]

Can you find forgiveness because trust can be lost forevermore? If someone has cheated, like my ex partner did, i did forgive but things were never the same. In hindsight, I was worth more than that because I had committed to a loving relationship. Well LOVE was lost.!

 

[gottago222]

id suggest never seeing this person again.. and forgiveness is really important, not for her but for yourself. i was cheated on and carried the hate in my heart for this person for years and it hurt ME... i thought i had to hate this person forever. hate is a very heavy unpleasant feeling in the body. once i forgave them i felt much better. i hardly ever think of this person or their actions and if i do for even a second not much emotions are involved.

 

[Capsicum_Corral]

My girlfriend cheated on me and it made me so miserable I went back to cutting myself. Now I don't know what to say to her when she asks about it neither what I should do regarding our relationship. Any advice?

End contact. She's a cheater.

Also stop cutting yourself. If you need pain, order some superhot pepper seeds (see my username), grow them in pots if you don't have garden space, and chow down once they turn bright red. There's also hot pepper powder and dried pods available on the internet in the meantime. Carolina Reapers can immediately make you forget about everything else in your life

 

[WhiteRabbit]

RED FLAG. Get out now. I know it hurts but things will only get worse.

 

[Of The Universe]

Very sorry you've been hurt.

 

[Feeding Pigeons]

Like everyone said before, dump her. Someone who cheats will do it again.

 

[Heartattackpending]

I had a girlfriend who cheated on me and dumped me, then wanted me back. I was still suffering so agreed to see her again. She dumped me again a couple of weeks later but, by then, I was over it, the poison had run its course. When she called me again I told her I had a new girlfriend which I didn't but it worked out for me. Never saw her again (fortunately she lived in another town, I used to commute to see her) and was glad not to. I agree, you should dump her for good. Things will never be the same.

 

[Chaestergram]

It's all up to you, but keep in mind that if you want to keep going on it takes two to rebuild a relationship and the person that did wrong to regain your trust and do the work.

It all depends on the relationship, nowadays tons of young people are quick to break up, they're young after all but when you have a mature relationship with an actual partner tons of more mature people are ready to work through it so again it's all up to you, review your entire relationship, how do you feel for her, how did you felt, why are you with her besides love, what is she bringing to you (receiving), is she contributing to your mental, physical, goal wellbeing or not ? Is she supporting you and giving you all the things that you need in a relationship (such as affection and so much more) ? Etc etc

If there is more no then you know what to do and for that know that it sure won't be the first nor last girlfriend you will have and focus on yourself and only you to heal from that, it's all temporary.

 

[Feeding Pigeons]

It's all up to you, but keep in mind that if you want to keep going on it takes two to rebuild a relationship and the person that did wrong to regain your trust and do the work.

This is 100% correct. Problem is, people who cheat frivolously tend to not be people who would make the effort of repairing a relationship.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

Dump, block, move on. I have a very low tolerance threshold for cheaters. Sorry this happened to you OP.

 

[Noctis]

If you honestly think she will make an effort to repair the relationship and have your best interest at heart, then it's worth it to try.

However, if you're wanting to get back together just to save yourself a heartache and because it's easy and comfortable, then you're just going to go through even more pain later. If you don't have the energy to tell her to take a hike, then become a ghost and break all contact. No one is worth that much pain.

 

[waitingforrest]

Cheating is one of the highest forms of betrayal in my opinion. It leaves the other person feeling undesirable. I don't really want to tell you what you should do, but don't bother trying to fix something if the other person never puts any effort in.

 

[idiotstillwantstodie]

My girlfriend cheated on me and it made me so miserable I went back to cutting myself. Now I don't know what to say to her when she asks about it neither what I should do regarding our relationship. Any advice?

Cheat her back with style.

 

[Mixo]

If there's one thing I've learned from being on this odd orb in space for the last three decades, it's that people generally do not change. Unless they have a burning, compelling and sometimes external force pressuring them to do so, it is very hard for most to change. I'm not saying necessarily she won't stop cheating, but that the underlying personality (whether that be impulsivity, pettiness, capriciousness, whatever) will be very hard to change. These are habits that take considerable time and investment of energy to consciously alter. Is that something you're willing to bet on? That would be my main question.

 

[maakies]

I have been on both sides. The whole cut and run narrative isn't as easy as it seems, and I know it seems like you wanna run back to her. But, if you're starting SH, you should definitely seek help from someone other than her. It'll complicate things less.