Venting Relapse with SH

[homesoon.]

I'm sick of coming back to this point. Feeling as though I can't just cbt and be done. So, instead, I try to revert the emotional pain to physical; the brain can only focus so much on one or the other. So, get drunk and relapse with self-harm or cbt? I know what I want to do, but you can't use SN when drinking. This feels like a fucked up way of trying to prevent myself from going through with it, even though I keep finding myself closer and closer to just doing it.

EDIT: I've learned to draw an outline on the bandage, press the outline on my leg, and draw between the lines.

 

[thereisthemist]

mist is now thinking about cutting right now as well