PlutonianRooster
Member
- Dec 16, 2024
- 27
I don't want to go into the details of my situation, but opening up led to the cascade of events that pushed me from being passively suicidal to making plans. I lost extremely important opportunities/time to alleviate the circumstances that made me suicidal in the first place, and am now all alone, on top of what I was already dealing with.
That's it. That is all I get for choosing hope and trust for the first time in my life. What the hell am I supposed to do with that?
A year ago, I set a reminder in my phone's calendar for the same date a year in the future. I told myself that, if I found even a small thread of hope by the time that day passed, I would persist; otherwise, I would move towards death.
There's one month left until that day and everything only got worse - worse than I ever imagined. It only gets worse.
I wish I died young - young enough for my parents to replace me. Young enough to not even understand what was happening, nor what I'd face in the future. Young enough to at least have someone care about my agony. I want it to stop. I need it to stop. Please.
That's it. That is all I get for choosing hope and trust for the first time in my life. What the hell am I supposed to do with that?
A year ago, I set a reminder in my phone's calendar for the same date a year in the future. I told myself that, if I found even a small thread of hope by the time that day passed, I would persist; otherwise, I would move towards death.
There's one month left until that day and everything only got worse - worse than I ever imagined. It only gets worse.
I wish I died young - young enough for my parents to replace me. Young enough to not even understand what was happening, nor what I'd face in the future. Young enough to at least have someone care about my agony. I want it to stop. I need it to stop. Please.
