Rant about friendship situation

[MoonBloom]

Okay so I just want to rant this out, thank you to anyone taking their time reading this

So I have this online best friend, we've been actively talking, playing, doing whatnot online for 7 months now and I have come to find out that he likes my other friend and plans to visit her(she's a country away).

Nothing wrong with that I'm happy for them but why do I feel suddenly lost though. Tbh this my first time having a guy-girl friendship that didn't turn into anything and we both established that right(only friends) but I guess there are times when we did stuff or smth happens that kinda crosses the friendship boundary but not enough for it to be romantic but just as jokes, but like it's alot of the jokes to the point where it kinda messes with me you know. And now that I find out he likes someone else I'm starting to question all the stuff in our friendship we're doing like, "oh is this romantic or just being friendly" cause again first time having a guy girl bff friendship thing lol

I'm not the type to overthink but for some reason I am, I wouldn't say I'm hurt but idk I'm thrown off. Idk what's wrong with me. Maybe it's cause now I'm thinking if they do get together or become a couple then what gonna happen to me? I thought we'd be bff's for life, well not that long lmao but yk what I mean for a long time we'd just be chilling with each other. Throughout our friendship a thought did cross my mind what if we did end up together cause there have been some people who thought we were dating cause we hang out everyday and play together all the time and rarely seen separated.

This is probably on me tho for even thinking that in the first place and letting my thoughts and imaginations menifest to that, maybe that's why I'm feeling the way I am but wouldn't really describe it as feeling heartbroken or hurts it's just the feeling of being humbled? is how I can describe it.

Now I'm left with this question for myself, how do I cope with this?

 

[FF777]

the way you are feeling is completely natural.. and even though the guy/girl dynamic makes the friendship a bit more intimate even though it is strictly supposed to be a friendship only, you would still be feeling the same even if it was with some one who you aren't sexually compatible with..... like i mean, even if it were a girl you talked to all the time and then she suddenly found some other friend to yap with and kind of abandoned you then you would still be feeling these types of feelings.......... but the guy/girl dynamic probably makes the feelings stronger a bit though..

so i'm not sure what to do about the situaiton to solve it, but don't try doing mental gymnastics like as if you are supposed to be a robot and not affected by it at all just because the relationship wasn't supposed to be romantic at all.... friends disregarding you (to what ever degree) hurts no matter what type of relationship it is..

i can tell you what my personal reaction would be though, but it might not be the correct thing to do....... i would probably feel hurt and pout by kind of abandoning him too to some degree........ maybe give him short answers to what ever he is yapping about and then continue doing what ever i'm doing.. or maybe i would also take a while to respond back to him like i'm not even concerned about him or what ever he is yapping about.. i'm a really cool friend to people but i kind of expect them to be cool back to me though..

 

[1000memoryleaks]

Okay so I just want to rant this out, thank you to anyone taking their time reading this

So I have this online best friend, we've been actively talking, playing, doing whatnot online for 7 months now and I have come to find out that he likes my other friend and plans to visit her(she's a country away).

Nothing wrong with that I'm happy for them but why do I feel suddenly lost though. Tbh this my first time having a guy-girl friendship that didn't turn into anything and we both established that right(only friends) but I guess there are times when we did stuff or smth happens that kinda crosses the friendship boundary but not enough for it to be romantic but just as jokes, but like it's alot of the jokes to the point where it kinda messes with me you know. And now that I find out he likes someone else I'm starting to question all the stuff in our friendship we're doing like, "oh is this romantic or just being friendly" cause again first time having a guy girl bff friendship thing lol

I'm not the type to overthink but for some reason I am, I wouldn't say I'm hurt but idk I'm thrown off. Idk what's wrong with me. Maybe it's cause now I'm thinking if they do get together or become a couple then what gonna happen to me? I thought we'd be bff's for life, well not that long lmao but yk what I mean for a long time we'd just be chilling with each other. Throughout our friendship a thought did cross my mind what if we did end up together cause there have been some people who thought we were dating cause we hang out everyday and play together all the time and rarely seen separated.

This is probably on me tho for even thinking that in the first place and letting my thoughts and imaginations menifest to that, maybe that's why I'm feeling the way I am but wouldn't really describe it as feeling heartbroken or hurts it's just the feeling of being humbled? is how I can describe it.

Now I'm left with this question for myself, how do I cope with this?

i would give it some time to see how it plays out and most importantly look at how he treats you during that time. if you feel like you're being treated in an entirely different way that doesn't sit right with you then don't hesitate to speak about it or take other measures you see fit

 

[MoonBloom]

the way you are feeling is completely natural.. and even though the guy/girl dynamic makes the friendship a bit more intimate even though it is strictly supposed to be a friendship only, you would still be feeling the same even if it was with some one who you aren't sexually compatible with..... like i mean, even if it were a girl you talked to all the time and then she suddenly found some other friend to yap with and kind of abandoned you then you would still be feeling these types of feelings.......... but the guy/girl dynamic probably makes the feelings stronger a bit though..

so i'm not sure what to do about the situaiton to solve it, but don't try doing mental gymnastics like as if you are supposed to be a robot and not affected by it at all just because the relationship wasn't supposed to be romantic at all.... friends disregarding you (to what ever degree) hurts no matter what type of relationship it is..

i can tell you what my personal reaction would be though, but it might not be the correct thing to do....... i would probably feel hurt and pout by kind of abandoning him too to some degree........ maybe give him short answers to what ever he is yapping about and then continue doing what ever i'm doing.. or maybe i would also take a while to respond back to him like i'm not even concerned about him or what ever he is yapping about.. i'm a really cool friend to people but i kind of expect them to be cool back to me though...

Actually I thought ab that the moment he told me his feelings for her my initial thought was to pull away, I didn't want to get between anything even though nothing has even happened yet but I knew if I did that out of the sudden, I would be acting out based from my emotions. Truth be told I don't want to cut him off from my life, I still want to be someone he can talk to or lean for support even though one day I'm no longer going to be his favorite person. Maybe I'm just going through a platonic heartbreak or smth idk

I should learn how to divide my time/happiness with my other friends, family or hobbies the only problem is, we both have kind of established a routine everyday now, that'll maybe be difficult for me to break.

i would give it some time to see how it plays out and most importantly look at how he treats you during that time. if you feel like you're being treated in an entirely different way that doesn't sit right with you then don't hesitate to speak about it or take other measures you see fit

He still treats me the same like how he always does, Ive been trying to support him actually with his decisions while I'm fighting demons lol