Random thoughts

[Rue89]

Why can't I just let things go? I still feel like shit about it. Sometimes I wish I could just stop caring.

 

[waived]

J

Why can't I just let things go? I still feel like shit about it. Sometimes I wish I could just stop caring.

If it's the same thing as before it's probably because you're really smart and you make discoveries by not letting things go so you're actually figuring things out. Maybe it's not just the figuring and it's that you can see things.

 

[Deleted member 13412]

i hope ss will be around for lots of time evn when we are all gone <3

 

[Sensei]

I wonder if my time actually has come.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I couldn't even handle getting two and a half hours of """work""" done. I just want to crawl back to bed and find something to watch.

 

[http-410]

Was working out and now I feel really, really down.

I never understood how people are able to feel better after exercise. Maybe I'm not a human being anymore.

That would explain a lot.

 

[VIBRITANNIA]

i wanted this. i wanted this. so why am i so fucking upset? no, upset isn't even the right word. i'm just pretending to upset, because i don't have any real attachment to people. i should be happy. this will make things easier, won't it?

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Saw therapist again today but it was far more uneventful I couldn't even tell her that my urge to die became so much stronger because I was afraid she'd try to step in. The only advice she could give me was to try more dating apps to get over 'her', but only if I'm ready and to be perfectly honest, I'm not ready at all nor do I think I ever will be.

 

[_Kaira_]

The world is so fucked. Why the hell am I still trying to prove to anyone anything? Well hopefully what I am doing will change my stance on life...probably not.

On the bright side, maybe I'll be able to get a slave wage job that isn't so bad. It beats fast food/retail! Well who am I kidding, I'm the most useless person I've ever known. They can see it too.

 

[Disappointered]

was i always just a weed among flowers? in a way yes, as were my parents
gonna get hungry soon...might have to eat...means might have to do semi cooking...fuck

 

[waived]

My fingers are losing their minds.

 

[http-410]

I just don't know. I just don't know anything anymore.

I've lost myself.

 

[antigone_iris]

Can't stand this stupid heartbreak anymore. I feel like I'm crawling. I just want to get back up. At least I watered my plants today. I'm happy the orange seeds are growing into tiny plants now.

 

[MichaelNomad123]

I'd like to think that all this pain I'm enduring has a purpose. I'd like to think that there is a strength to it or that because I'm taking it someone else doesn't have to or that it shows up as a positive attribute on my heaven or reincarnation resume.

 

[GrumpyFrog]

I can't do this shit anymore. I can't take another day of it. I have nothing. I have no one. I work two full time jobs and still can't afford food. Everything I ever cared about is gone. I am in constant pain waiting for another day to end all day every day. No one deserves to live like this. What's the point of getting through it? There is nothing ahead except for the same thing over and over until I get old, even more unwell and die from an illness. Why do I have to suffer through this?
Today is awful.

 

[voyager]

We were in the middle of a conversation that I thought was going good though, then they just stopped replying. I guess I said the wrong thing. That's the only reason it bugs me.

Have had people not reply and sometimes not replied myself for a while. Doesn't have to be negative or aimed at you. With me at least it's that I'm sometimes like paralysed and just getting the day by. Don't mean no harm. Have also gotten replies after several days/weeks, so maybe they'll get back to you too.

 

[BitterlyAlive]

Yesterday I had an odd thought: in the midst of chaos, how can someone be so calm? I think I just numbed out lol.

 

[http-410]

Wondering if it's not better to become minced meat in one go or to suffer for 20 minutes. I worry about being too stupid for the original idea.

What am I doing.
I don't know what to think/feel/do. Nothing fits.

I wished to become a human being again.

Now I'm stuck in a loop. I have to wake up.

But first I need to sleep. Hopefully I won't need a sleeping pill later on.

 

[woxihuanni]

Yesterday I had an odd thought: in the midst of chaos, how can someone be so calm? I think I just numbed out lol.

I know how. Brain hides under blanket.

 

[waived]

I am watching the Terminator series and drinking tea. The movie Miracle Mile is one of the most underrated not talked about movies ever.

 

[Shinkansen]

"if you get anxious when you drive, you can't take the car, or you risk killing people" phrase said today by my driving instructor during a practical test.
I can't even get a driver's license, I want to stop this fucking car nightmare, I've been fighting for a driver's license for years.
that's enough, I don't want to drive anymore, I'll die on foot.

 

[waived]

"if you get anxious when you drive, you can't take the car, or you risk killing people" phrase said today by my driving instructor during a practical test.
I can't even get a driver's license, I want to stop this fucking car nightmare, I've been fighting for a driver's license for years.
that's enough, I don't want to drive anymore, I'll die on foot.

@shinkansen

Practice. Repetition. Visualization. Can you get more driving time with the instructor or on your own in a big parking lot?

 

[Shinkansen]

@shinkansen

Practice. Repetition. Visualization. Can you get more driving time with the instructor or on your own in a big parking lot?

I've driven a lot and have done more than 50 driving tests with three different instructors, lasting between thirty minutes and an hour, I've broken the driving school record and I'm still a beginner. driving is not for me, there are people who are not fit to drive and who can be a danger on the roads, I'm one of them.
I've been trying to learn for years, I'm wasting money in vain and the driving license is very expensive.

 

[Panna]

"if you get anxious when you drive, you can't take the car, or you risk killing people" phrase said today by my driving instructor during a practical test.
I can't even get a driver's license, I want to stop this fucking car nightmare, I've been fighting for a driver's license for years.
that's enough, I don't want to drive anymore, I'll die on foot.

God do I get you, parents constantly tell me to try and drive and yet I just can't. I'm too nervous that I will go off the road, or I might hurt someone elses car. Then while I'm driving I tend to stop when I shouldn't to let other people go first even though I'm told that's not allowed, you have the right of way. I never understand this, I'm in no hurry to go somewhere, why should I brute force my way through?

 

[VIBRITANNIA]

god is dead, and we killed him with our own hands. i do not want to breathe a second longer.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Why can't I fit in? Why can't I just be a good little communist sjw like everyone else around me? Why do I have to be so contrarian? I don't even think I'd fit in at a republican area either I'm just built to hate whatever the majority thinks even if it seems objectively good. I just wish I could see the future things I want to see and die already.

And I'm STILL procrastinating on my work too.

 

[Panna]

Why can't I fit in? Why can't I just be a good little communist sjw like everyone else around me? Why do I have to be so contrarian? I don't even think I'd fit in at a republican area either I'm just built to hate whatever the majority thinks even if it seems objectively good. I just wish I could see the future things I want to see and die already.

And I'm STILL procrastinating on my work too.

Is sacrificing what makes you you worth it in order to join a group where even the members themselves hate each other? There was a wonderful clip of chaz where a member has his car broken into, and to top it off a girl walks up to him while hes screaming about his car, snatches two cokes out of the box he just bought and runs off into the crowd. If the group would accept you and treat as one of their own, thatd be one thing i'd think. Also same here, I'm procrastinating on a big essay because why not.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Is sacrificing what makes you you worth it in order to join a group where even the members themselves hate each other?

That's the frustrating part is that none of us actually hate each other, though it's more hypocritical that they don't hate me when on social media they say shit like "unfollow me if you voted for yes on prop blank" or "remember to disown all your trump supporting family and friends" and I'm like HELLO I'm right here and I literally admitted that I support him! The fuck is wrong with you people?

 

[Panna]

That's the frustrating part is that none of us actually hate each other, though it's more hypocritical that they don't hate me when on social media they say shit like "unfollow me if you voted for yes on prop blank" or "remember to disown all your trump supporting family and friends" and I'm like HELLO I'm right here and I literally admitted that I support him! The fuck is wrong with you people?

Sounds like those types are the ones only looking to fit in with the group. The virtual signaling ones who have no intention of following up with their threats unless pushed to.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Sounds like those types are the ones only looking to fit in with the group. The virtual signaling ones who have no intention of following up with their threats unless pushed to.

That's exactly what practically everyone in California is like and I hate it so much.