Questioning my suicidality

[IWantToSleep]

Would I still ctb if I had to use one of my least preferred methods eg. jumping or drowning? If I wouldn't does that mean I don't truly want to end my life or I shouldn't? I don't know, just a thought that crossed my mind.

 

[lost_soul83]

I think that there is never a good time to ctb. There will always be some obstacle, some distraction. That doesn't mean you shouldn't or couldn't ctb or that it's not the right time, because it's never the right time. It takes commitment to ctb. Not many people can actually go through with it, no matter how badly they want to.

 

[foxdie]

It will never be easy friend, regardless of method. I agree with what @lost_soul83 said too.

Don't let the thought just cross your mind, let it in and examine it, would be my advice. Ctb is very serious and very difficult.

 

[NodusTollens]

I can appreciate your dilemma, "if I really wanted it, wouldn't I do it by any means necessary?" I don't think it's fair to hold yourself to that metric, fear is a powerful motivator- or I suppose in this case, demotivator.

Your thoughts & feelings regarding CTB, are valid whether or not you CTB now, years down the line, or even if you one day change your mind altogether.

—hugs—