mittymittens
let's make it quick, ok?
- Jun 11, 2023
- 70
my friend is friends (possibly dating) with someone who non-conned kissed me, which is apparently sexual assault which i told him, told him that she emotionally dumped me for months
she obviously shit talks me to him
when i was friends with her i also felt the need to like her back because she also liked me, constantly love-bombing and telling me i was the best person she has ever met.
but didn't respect my boundaries when i told her to stop venting as much as her personal life was beginning to put me in deep depression and i even cut myself a lot because she put me in such deep depression.
but he is still friendly with her, yet he's also friendly with me
is this someone my friend? or is it like what my therapist said, "people are friends with criminals all the time, he's friends with her because he has different experiences with her"
i posted things about him on my sub about him and u guys tell he may not be the best friend to have and my friends say the same.
i'm just confused, he told me
"feel so bad for telling you my totally off mishearing i didnt think it wouldve had such a impact
what to do to fix that with you?
before ive just had the hope of maybe getting you all back togther but yeah later figured it was never going to happen
finding out i heard wrong was from some random mention of it in a convo"
i respond with
"it's not rly that, it just makes me scared that u guys are having convos about me"
he says "with seeing this i wasnt too sure with what to say
that kinda feeling does really stink
but now with the thing cleared up theres no reason for it to happen so i think if anything comes up i gotta go shhush the up"
which context is two months ago he tells me, that my ex friend told him that i'm telling people she selfharming, which now is apparently was a mishear.
even if it's not true i'm still triggered by her, when i wasn't before, which i'm not sure why it's coming out now, maybe it was the fact he said "good news, i misheard her, and said that u told the guidance counselor about her problems" which wasn't true either but i guess not bad as the other lie.
it may be the fact i may feel really uncomfortable with one of my friends continuing to associate with her after knowing everything, but i also know it's his life and i'm also very against with me into forcing him to stop being friends with her.
but i also know that it's also affecting me that my friend is associating with her and the only obvious way to calm myself down permanently is to simply cut him off.
the thing is i don't want to cut him off for some motive, i enjoy talking to him when i do but i also know it's harming me. what is everyone's thoughts? what would you do?
she obviously shit talks me to him
when i was friends with her i also felt the need to like her back because she also liked me, constantly love-bombing and telling me i was the best person she has ever met.
but didn't respect my boundaries when i told her to stop venting as much as her personal life was beginning to put me in deep depression and i even cut myself a lot because she put me in such deep depression.
but he is still friendly with her, yet he's also friendly with me
is this someone my friend? or is it like what my therapist said, "people are friends with criminals all the time, he's friends with her because he has different experiences with her"
i posted things about him on my sub about him and u guys tell he may not be the best friend to have and my friends say the same.
i'm just confused, he told me
"feel so bad for telling you my totally off mishearing i didnt think it wouldve had such a impact
what to do to fix that with you?
before ive just had the hope of maybe getting you all back togther but yeah later figured it was never going to happen
finding out i heard wrong was from some random mention of it in a convo"
i respond with
"it's not rly that, it just makes me scared that u guys are having convos about me"
he says "with seeing this i wasnt too sure with what to say
that kinda feeling does really stink
but now with the thing cleared up theres no reason for it to happen so i think if anything comes up i gotta go shhush the up"
which context is two months ago he tells me, that my ex friend told him that i'm telling people she selfharming, which now is apparently was a mishear.
even if it's not true i'm still triggered by her, when i wasn't before, which i'm not sure why it's coming out now, maybe it was the fact he said "good news, i misheard her, and said that u told the guidance counselor about her problems" which wasn't true either but i guess not bad as the other lie.
it may be the fact i may feel really uncomfortable with one of my friends continuing to associate with her after knowing everything, but i also know it's his life and i'm also very against with me into forcing him to stop being friends with her.
but i also know that it's also affecting me that my friend is associating with her and the only obvious way to calm myself down permanently is to simply cut him off.
the thing is i don't want to cut him off for some motive, i enjoy talking to him when i do but i also know it's harming me. what is everyone's thoughts? what would you do?
