I was also nervous of this and tried for my first time a couple of months ago (I've only done a handful of times since then). I recommend microdosing at first (no more than 0.5g). Buy a food scale if you have to weigh the pieces of mushroom.
It's not a cure all right away, like I thought it would be. But it's a continual conscious process. I literally decided to try it for the first time BECAUSE I was in the worst place my life has ever been in. Most people are scared of taking it while being in a dark place. Imo there are no bad trips, but there are lessons, which have opened my mind in so many ways. When you take it, go in with the intention of changing yourself and learning. it literally feels like I put in actual hard work, in a good way, whenever I take it. To me, it's not a passive event and I think it needs to be respected.
The few times I've done it, I've learned so much, cried so much in a cathartic good way, and also learned to feel more appreciative and at peace. I'm learning I may need to do it more regularly to manage depression bc it unfortunately doesn't last long for me. I have noticed subtle long term differences in myself though. I'm still struggling with intense feelings of ctb, but that might be bc of my external situations. I do feel like psilocybin has helped but if I decide that I want to live, I need to start getting on a frequent microdosing regimen and I need to find the courage to ask others for help.
I'm not giving medical advice for you to try it, but I would say research what you can. You can also search "mushies" in TikTok to listen to other people who've tried and what their experiences are. (The search words "psilocybin" and "shrooms" are banned on TikTok but the phrase "mushies" works)
I've only taken at most 0.5g and never hallucinated. And never was "stuck." it does make my stomach feel weird though, but I've gotten more used to it. It does still make me feel anxiety before my body starts to metabolize it. Make sure you're in a safe environment and not driving (also don't plan to be driving until you're completely sober, which may take more than a few hours, depending).
I would recommend taking the physical mushroom pieces instead of gummies or chocolate that claim to include psilocybin, so you know you're getting the actual mushroom and no other substance.
If you ever need to talk about this or anything else, lmk:)
Good luck and if you try it, I would love to hear your experiences and lessons learned from taking it!
These are some of my personal lessons (I understand they may not be applicable to anyone other than me):
*We all have different adversities but we all have the same suffering.
*There is no destination in life - even if you have a goal, that's never the destination, it's only a pitstop.
*Instead of holding onto loss, hold onto hope.
*Instead of protecting others from their own suffering, help others to level up
*No experience is ever wasted.
*Embrace the temporary
*Take care of yourself so you can give your best self to help others
