Privacy after suicide and perceptions at work before you act

[tiredxillenial]

On a whim I searched 'sucide (name of where I work) employee.' I thought there would be a number of hits, but pretty much everything that came up was related to one suicide a few years ago that was in the media pretty heavy with a missing person report and then report of the body being found several weeks later. What I saw tonight is that there was a huge (hundreds of pages) document about the death investigation that was released to the media. I don't know if such long reports are done for 'regular' suicides or deaths, but I certainly don't think they are released to the media if so! Anyhow, it's upsetting because I would want to just disappear and I don't want anything about me being published or anything. Does anyone know anything about how to keep yourself private after you go missing or act? I'm in the States. Would giving a damed note stop authorities from potentially releasing a long ass report with your private information to the media? I'm not as high level as the employee who commited suicde a few years ago, but with c*v*d a suicide probably would be in the media because of the field I'm in/where I work.

The employee who committed suicide a few years ago I think probably had childhood trauma/abusive parents based on what was in the article I read. I feel for him and relate because that's my situation too. He was dashing-- probably not someone I would have suspected was suicidal if I interacted with him at work. I don't know if people would say the same about me. I don't think work knows how depressed I am. I have been doing my darndest to mask the depression and suicidality, but with c*v*d I think I maybe have been giving off subtle indications.

The team lead wanted to check in with me a few weeks ago because I had my camera off on the first zoom of the year. My supervisor had/has c*v*d and I thought the team lead was calling with bad news about my supervisor. We talked a bit and after a few minutes I couldn't really contain my anxiety and kinda freaked out a bit and asked if my supervisor was OK. I thought the team lead was just touching base with me first before she was going to say my supervisor was in the hospital or had died. She told me she wasn't calling with bad news; she mentioned being a mom a few times and commented about my camera being off. Maybe some supervisors are expecting stress from c*v*d and are "on alert" for indications of depression or suicidality in employees. I don't know if it reveals anything about me that I automatically assumed she was calling with bad news about my supervisor and c*v*d.

I don't have immediate plans to act right now and am trying to access more intensive treatment. Been trying to for several months. Different parts of me have different orientations to hopefullness, living, etc. I want to know how to keep a danged 600 page document on me from being released to the media though if I act! I would love for there to just not be an investigation. It's scary how much can be known about you from store records, surveillence video, and asking the public for tips.

 

[Spiral]

Write a last will and testament and put any and all wishes for privacy after exit in there and leave it with your lawyer or a family member. If they want to know why you made a will it would be easy to say you want to be prepared because you are scared of covid

 

[Miss_Takes]

I dont think you need to worry too much about the team leader conversation. It is likely just a checkin re how youre coping with Covid stress and knowing your supervisor is unwell in the first instance. Possibly the team leader has picked up on a bit of your stress and it is an attempt to offer a little 'understanding' if not a direct offer of support ... which might feel overwhelming.
As I read what you wrote about that interaction it seemed a gentle and positive act of kindness on her part (even if motivated by work lol).
If you are seeking assistance for depression perhaps it is worth considering the TLeader as someone who possibly has some personal experience of depression .... of course you know her 'style' and may be able to work out her intentions.

As for your question about media privacy I am a bit clueless on that front sorry.

I do hope whatever treatment you try is helpful to you.

 

[FakePlasticTrees]

I think maybe having someway that you could be found not too long after dying would help. I don't know everything about the case of that employee obviously, but it seems like it may have got a lot of coverage because of them being missing at first. As morbid as it is consumers love missing person cases so reporters exploit the hell out of them it seems.
I've had a direct family member who committed suicide, and an acquaintance, as well as a peer who CTB'd while I was studying at the same university. I never heard of any major reports about them and a passive search seems to show there never were. While that's super anecdotal it seems like not many people get extensive reports about their suicides

 

[tiredxillenial]

I dont think you need to worry too much about the team leader conversation. It is likely just a checkin re how youre coping with Covid stress and knowing your supervisor is unwell in the first instance. Possibly the team leader has picked up on a bit of your stress and it is an attempt to offer a little 'understanding' if not a direct offer of support ... which might feel overwhelming.
As I read what you wrote about that interaction it seemed a gentle and positive act of kindness on her part (even if motivated by work lol).
If you are seeking assistance for depression perhaps it is worth considering the TLeader as someone who possibly has some personal experience of depression .... of course you know her 'style' and may be able to work out her intentions.

As for your question about media privacy I am a bit clueless on that front sorry.

I do hope whatever treatment you try is helpful to you.

Thanks! I read it as kind and gentle too. I was rambling from the whole media report to how I may be percieved at work, which got me to there :-)

I think maybe having someway that you could be found not too long after dying would help. I don't know everything about the case of that employee obviously, but it seems like it may have got a lot of coverage because of them being missing at first. As morbid as it is consumers love missing person cases so reporters exploit the hell out of them it seems.
I've had a direct family member who committed suicide, and an acquaintance, as well as a peer who CTB'd while I was studying at the same university. I never heard of any major reports about them and a passive search seems to show there never were. While that's super anecdotal it seems like not many people get extensive reports about their suicides

Yeah I wasn't assuming there would be a big report. Normally even when someone goes missing, media will just report when the body is found, if they even report that. This was a 600 page document on the death investigation that was released to the media. I'm pretty sure that happened becasue of what his job was and where he worked. It's kinda intimidating!