Discussion parents who are happy while their child is depressed

[fkyou]

I am confused over parents who see their child being depressed or unsatisfied with their life or in agonizing emotional pain and then go on with their day/life ..if it was my child I'd kill myself (figuratively)

 

[thereisnoone]

Goes to show every human is inherently selfish for survival even if its your own blood

 

[divinemistress87]

Yes! My mom is like this. I think shes desensitzed to me being so depressed for so many years. Ill cry and say I want to die and she will say Im sorry honey and go back to obsessively cleaning the house. If I had a kid who was depressed I would do everything in my power to help them and take them to the top specialists ect

Goes to show every human is inherently selfish for survival even if its your own blood

We are animals at our core

 

[Peace2peace]

Am in a similar situation but sometimes u really can't blame them cause they hv their life to live

 

[dust-in-the-wind]

My mom is happy and enjoys life. She cannot comprehend what depression even is. Unless you experience it first hand, you can't understand how horrific a state of being it is.

 

[Unrequitedlife]

I suppose it could be some kind of subconscious coping mechanism. It's possible that as you say they don't understand depression and as a result are frightened of trying to help but doing more damage than good. I'm not saying this is the case but merely a possibility. I hope things improve for you in terms of your depression.

 

[eternallyluna]

I can relate to that. Part of the reason why I don't want to have children is because of my mental illness (Bipolar Disorder). I can't fathom the idea of possibly passing that onto a child and watching them suffer from the same thing that has made my life a living hell.

Most people are selfish. Hell, humankind is inherently selfish. I am selfish and must be mindful of this as I navigate life.

I don't know the particulars of your situation, but it's awful that your parents are carrying on as normal while you are in pain. Being a good parent is signing up for a lifetime of being there for your child no matter the circumstances. You deserve that.

 

[fkyou]

My mom is happy and enjoys life. She cannot comprehend what depression even is. Unless you experience it first hand, you can't understand how horrific a state of being it is.

I don't know what's depression.. exactly..all I know is that I feel feelings of unsafety..fear over financial security..fear over the future..i thought (and still think)that my feelings are circumstancial,and are reasonable (i didn't grow up in the best environment) but the people around me are fine even with these -what I think are- horrible circumstances..is all this just in my head? Ami genetically fked forever? Isn't it circumstancial? If it's not does that mean everything I stood for and worried/worry about was meaningless?and that these feelings are innate not circumstancial? Aren't my thoughts reasonable?if not how can I ever trust myself again

 

[sanction]

Fuck those parents. Mine are like that

Things like this makes you give up on this world. Even those suppose to be "closest" to you are this cruel and selfish after all

Then what other expectations can you even have? There's no one to truly rely or depend on but yourself

Fuck this world, getting tired of it

 

[Forever Sleep]

Maybe they feel as if they have to be strong in order to still be able to support their child. Maybe they hope that their positive influence will rub off on them. Or, maybe they just tell themselves it's nothing they did wrong (whether it was or wasn't.) That they're doing all they possibly can to support the child and so- they needn't feel guilt.

I know what you mean though. That's the personal reason I'm antinatalist. I couldn't bare to see my child unhappy. It would break my heart. And, I feel certain they would be. With a proportion of my genes, they'd be screwed from the start! I love them too much to expose them to this world and my (no doubt) useless parenting in trying to navigate it.

 

[fkyou]

Maybe they feel as if they have to be strong in order to still be able to support their child. Maybe they hope that their positive influence will rub off on them. Or, maybe they just tell themselves it's nothing they did wrong (whether it was or wasn't.) That they're doing all they possibly can to support the child and so- they needn't feel guilt.

That's the most sane explanation to this..thanks for answering my question

 

[sanction]

Maybe they feel as if they have to be strong in order to still be able to support their child. Maybe they hope that their positive influence will rub off on them. Or, maybe they just tell themselves it's nothing they did wrong (whether it was or wasn't.) That they're doing all they possibly can to support the child and so- they needn't feel guilt.

I know what you mean though. That's the personal reason I'm antinatalist. I couldn't bare to see my child unhappy. It would break my heart. And, I feel certain they would be. With a proportion of my genes, they'd be screwed from the start! I love them too much to expose them to this world and my (no doubt) useless parenting in trying to navigate it.

Maybe some are like that. But also many are just simply assholes, they just don't realize it

Life itself is already hard WITHOUT kids. So to even include KIDS (sometimes even multiple), it's just simply a recipe for disaster

It is a mess right off the start. So to add too much positivity and reasons to it later on, is mainly just a fantasy

These days and age, with living cost rising, you begin to see retired "parents" with their paid off houses, while the "kids" are moving into their cars / vans / RV, or with roommates

Yet the parents are "okay" with this

That says it all

 

[cosmic-realism]

Typical narcississts