Venting Not showering for weeks

[fluorescentpearl]

I haven't showered in ages, I feel too depressed to, having to look at myself makes me suicidal, and the idea of standing nude in a shower makes me want to. Kill myself even more, I'm just rotting away at this point, I know it's gross and disgusting to talk about but I don't know where else to say it..

I can't go to the bathroom either, my inability to eat makes bowel movements nonexistent

I feel horrible, I guess now that SN is coming that's how I'll have to go, I don't know

I feel so gross, I hope no one will be too freaked out by me saying this all
.
I have to go shower but I don't want to, I'm so anxious and scared to enter the shower, I don't know what to do

 

[Mooncry]

Nobody ever wants to talk about the gross parts of severe depression. For me, I can usually get myself to shower every other day/every two days. Brushing my teeth is harder. I hate doing it. I get no pleasure from the act of brushing so sometimes I'll go 3 or more days without. Genuinely have no clue how some people manage to do it twice a day, or even after every meal. Hygiene can be so hard when you're mentally unwell, but I do try my best. When I know I'm gonna be going out and interacting with people, I shower and brush, but it sucks.

Also with me being autistic, being filthy and stinky is a huge sensory issue for me, so that combined with having zero willpower to be clean is a fun time indeed.

You're not alone! Many people are struggling with it to at least some degree.

 

[hughmun9]

I understand... for the past 3 months I've maybe showered once every 2 weeks, sometimes 3. When I was working I was showering every day. When you don't leave the house and don't interact with anyone the only consequence of not showering is having to stomach your own stench, but after a while your nose gets used to it...

 

[sacrilegeofsouls]

I haven't showered in ages, I feel too depressed to, having to look at myself makes me suicidal, and the idea of standing nude in a shower makes me want to. Kill myself even more, I'm just rotting away at this point, I know it's gross and disgusting to talk about but I don't know where else to say it..

I can't go to the bathroom either, my inability to eat makes bowel movements nonexistent

I feel horrible, I guess now that SN is coming that's how I'll have to go, I don't know

I feel so gross, I hope no one will be too freaked out by me saying this all
.
I have to go shower but I don't want to, I'm so anxious and scared to enter the shower, I don't know what to do

I remember when I used to be at my worst I couldn't even get up from bed or get myself to eat let alone shower it's like smallest thing feels like climbing mount everest I think what's best is to take the pressure off ease yourself into it no force no sort of commitment or expectation