My boyfriend attempted.

[betterinthedark]

Today while I was at work, my boyfriend tried to take his life. He's struggled with chronic depression and addiction since his early teens. We just spent a few days together, I slept at his house for a few days and he seemed happy and okay. Last night it was time for me to go home so I acted strange because my home life isn't good and I didn't want to go back. I let him know that but when I fell asleep he vented to me but I missed it. I told him he wasnt a failure and he's done so much already just by becoming sober. He then sent me a text a few hours later and said "I'm not sober, I'm sorry, I love you." After I got the police to him, he called me while I was in the ambulance and he said he didn't want to be here. I don't know what I did wrong. He swore he was sober, I always told him he could tell me anything and I wouldn't be angry, he was honest about smoking again, but he hid this from me. I thought I made him feel safe enough to talk to me but I failed. I thought he knew he could come to me for anything and that I would drop everything to help him. I feel like a failure of a significant other. I'm so lost. I don't know what to do, I helped him get a job and I helped him through his last break up. What should I do, how do I help him now? I don't want to lose him.

 

[Sphinxi]

As cliche as it sounds, you cannot help someone who doesn't want to be helped. If he wants to die, and is going to hide things from you and whatnot, then all that you can do is your best to help him. Remember that this wasn't your fault, and anything that happens in the future also isn't your fault.

 

[vyvanceandvodka]

I'm so sorry. His attempt is not your fault at all. Please don't blame yourself. He needs to want to help himself. If he doesn't want to, there's not much you can do. :( I hope you can find ways to take care of yourself during this time.

 

[_AllCatsAreGrey_]

I'm sorry OP. I can't imagine the stress. It sounds that you care a lot for him. Please don't be too hard on yourself. His actions and the things he hid are his.

Perhaps when time passes and he recovers from the attempt you may be able to talk more directly with him. In the meantime, I wish you peace of mind. It must be difficult.

 

[betterinthedark]

I'm sorry OP. I can't imagine the stress. It sounds that you care a lot for him. Please don't be too hard on yourself. His actions and the things he hid are his.

Perhaps when time passes and he recovers from the attempt you may be able to talk more directly with him. In the meantime, I wish you peace of mind. It must be difficult.

I will talk to him when he's better. I just don't know where to go from here.

 

[_AllCatsAreGrey_]

I will talk to him when he's better. I just don't know where to go from here.

I imagine he feels similar. Not knowing what to do is uncomfortable. Everything is up in the air. I hope you're able to find the space to take care of yourself too. One day at a time.