life is just so monotone

[kanixx]

I'm bored. I'm so tired of life, nothing really is worth living for anymore, everyone says I'm unlikeable too. I'm getting worse by the day, I don't know what to do with myself anymore. Maybe I should CTB, the days are just so monotone.

You ever just wish you could go back to being a kid ? So much pressure now, I'm just human. I miss it when my only job was to get up early and go to school. But, I wonder what death's like, it's scary in a sense. That's the only thing keeping me alive, I don't know what death's like. I'll eventually have to die one day though, is it worth living anymore ? I'm just gonna advance something inevitable.

 

[loyalskateboard]

Life is extremely monotonous. I basically live the same day every day and I hate it. I wouldn't go back to being a kid if you paid me but I'm tired too. I hate it.

 

[plastic]

Life is monotonous if all your doors are closed. There are countless possibilities to make it not monotonous, but the problem is that the options for realization are turned off and we are spinning non-stop in circle. Specifically, if I had enough money to not have to fight to survive, my life would be interesting. Since I have to fight for survival and there is no indication that this will change, of course it is monotonous.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Is it monotonous because you no longer have any interest in anything anymore? Or, because you are in a situation where you can't do things you'd like to try? Not that either are particularly easy to solve to be honest.

I think I've gotten a lot worse since the pandemic. I used to at least try to be spontaneous now and again and go places but I just can't be bothered with anything now.

I suppose I'd like to be a child in terms of- not having to work or have any responsibilities. My actual childhood was awful though- life was way worse for me then than it is now- plus, I want less life in front of me, not more! Still- I understand your sentiment and I'm sorry life feels so dull.

 

[FuneralCry]

Existing certainly is so tedious and futile to me, it's insane to me to actually want to be trapped here, enduring endless days just to risk experiencing even worse suffering at any moment.

And even if there wasn't any extreme suffering or risk of it, then the emptiness and disatisfaction would always remain, it's a burden being conscious and aware, existing could never be a desirable state to me, I would never want to go back to being a young child, I only want nothingness, freedom from this repulsive world, the reality is that there is no point to existing, human beings just repeat the same tasks again and again, they are going around in circles leading to nothing and nowhere other than being tormented by old age. Existence itself is the mistake, it's the true problem, I only fear this world and I find comfort in the thought of being permanently gone.

 

[Woelki]