Lacking the sense to speak.

[Parnate]

I am 32 year old man. I lack the sense to speak, I don't understand or I lack an understanding of what not to speak, what to speak. I very often say things that are not to be said. For example once while I was travelling with my sister and husband on a highway , I spoke about a spot that had frequent accidents. My friends have also told me about things I should have not said.
To worsen this all I have Avoidant personality disorder. So it hurts so badly and intensely .
I often make a resolve to speak only when necessary. But I have this strong desire to talk, express, interact and very often I speak something stupid.

 

[scary]

I get this. I was the weird kid growing up and the few times I was able to overcome my shyness the way everyone reacted to whatever I said with rude glances or vitriol is a big reason why I stopped talking altogether. Now I have rejection sensitivity dysphoria and avpd. Speaking when spoken to or out of necessity is how I operate now.

 

[trav4d0fudid3x]

i feel this way a lot. any tips on how to deal with this desire to communicate whilst being an avoidant person?