Is this sensation known to anyone?

[BigBang1]

It's been a year since I went through a traumatic experience. Since then, I've noticed something strange: when I'm in a very stressful situation, I feel an intense heat on my neck and upper back, followed by an urge to ctb. Is this feeling common among people who want to ctb? I've already made peace with the idea and even set a date. However, as that date gets closer, I find myself becoming more hesitant, and I've been thinking of using those triggers to make sure I follow through. (Planning to jump in front of a train)

 

[soon4good]

PTSD perhaps?

 

[BigBang1]

might be. I'm more interested in knowing if people who want to ctb feel a similar sensation on stressful situations

 

[soon4good]

might be. I'm more interested in knowing if people who want to ctb feel a similar sensation on stressful situations

Often ctb is an impulsive decision so I would assume this to be the case. I sometimes spiral into hopelessness and feel like I'm going to or have to hurt myself .

 

[BigBang1]

Impulsive as in not meditated Or as a OCD?

 

[piger]

I used to have a similar feeling where I felt choking on my neck when I got urges or spiraled in thought. Don't think it would have helped me at all but whatever you believe in yourself will manifest in how you come out.

 

[avalokitesvara]

Yes, I know what you're talking about and it happens to me. As far as I know I don't have PTSD and definitely not OCD. It feels kind of like shame, perhaps. It was much more intense and frequent when I was taking an SSRI for some reason.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Yeah, the fight or flight response can be triggered quite easily and manifest in the sensations you describe. I remember watching Nik Wallenda back in 2013 traverse himself over the Grand Canyon on a tightrope. My palms were soaking wet and my heart was racing a crazy high rate. I can easily see how stress could trigger similar responses in someone due to a past trauma. I don't know about the urge to ctb from it. Probably was already there at the time, or came about from the event, and just manifests itself, too, during high stress. It's about escape - needing to escape from the situation, most likely. Is during stress the only time you want to ctb? is your wanting to ctb not rooted more deeply than that?

 

[istherehope]

I have the same thing. My hands are shaking too and I feel like my skin is burning. I've been diagnosed with PTSD though.