Is it abuse if you are the boss/mentor

[WhatPowerIs]

To you who don't understand the attraction towards BDSM and similar activities, there's a reason why the Fifty Shades books are some of the most read in the world - they are based on sexual fantasies that many women share, and perhaps some men as well.

Sure, I was always baffled by the books' popularity but "sex sells." As it were.

 

[Julgran]

Sure, I was always baffled by the books' popularity but "sex sells." As it were.

I don't see how the contents of those books can be so arousing, but everyone has their own taste

 

[lofticries]

I thought the bdsm community hated 50 shades.

 

[hamvil]

It's sweet to treat another human being like a dog? That's news to me.

People chose to do that, they are not forced. This should not be hard to understand in a pro-choice forum.

 

[Someone123]

To you who don't understand the attraction towards BDSM and similar activities, there's a reason why the Fifty Shades books are some of the most read in the world - they are based on sexual fantasies that many women share, and perhaps some men as well.

Just because something has some popularity doesn't mean it is healthy- purposely hurting someone is demeaning and degrading compared to treating them with real caring and affection.

 

[Julgran]

Just because something has some popularity doesn't mean it is healthy- purposely hurting someone is demeaning and degrading compared to treating them with real caring and affection.

I do agree in so far as something may have happened early on in the participants' lives that may make BDSM necessary for a sexual release, but that doesn't necessarily make it immoral, since neither party will or should agree to it if they aren't knowledgeable or curious about what it entails. Simple code words/safety words will probably suffice in those situations.

As little as I know about BDSM, I don't believe that it has anything to do with hurting another human being - just the excitement of being "a little" in danger. If you want more information about this, I hope that someone who has actually taken part in this kind of activity can give you a better answer.

 

[WhatPowerIs]

People chose to do that, they are not forced. This should not be hard to understand in a pro-choice forum.

Not my point.

 

[hamvil]

Just because something has some popularity doesn't mean it is healthy- purposely hurting someone is demeaning and degrading compared to treating them with real caring and affection.

You are just proving your ignorance over and over again. You fail to understand what BDSM is yet you spit sentences that make no sense at all. I feel sorry for the small and limited world in which you like your life must be really terrible. Try to open your mind and do not be scared about your sexuality if you ever had any.

Not my point.

Then you should try to articulate it better if you are able to do so.

 

[WhatPowerIs]

I feel sorry for the small and limited world in which you like your life must be really terrible.

Don't you think that's kind of just a crazy thing to say? All because they don't personally like BDSM?

 

[hamvil]

Don't you think that's kind of just a crazy thing to say? All because they don't personally like BDSM?

He/she is not saying that he/she does not lie BDSM. He/she is saying that all the people doing it are unhealthy or are doing something wrong. It is like saying that the fact that so many people ad on SS does not mean that the right to suicide is valid. It is a matter of free choice in both cases. Nobody is forcing anyone to commit suicide and nobody is forcing anybody to do BDSM, actually BDSM is the exact opposite of forcing a person.

 

[WhatPowerIs]

He/she is not saying that he/she does not lie BDSM. He/she is saying that all the people doing it are unhealthy or are doing something wrong. It is like saying that the fact that so many people ad on SS does not mean that the right to suicide is valid. It is a matter of free choice in both cases. Nobody is forcing anyone to commit suicide and nobody is forcing anybody to do BDSM, actually BDSM is the exact opposite of forcing a person.

And you think their life must seem really terrible because...?

 

[hamvil]

And you think their life must seem really terrible because...?

Because their mind is so small that it cannot understand that the world is made by infinite permutation, desires and tastes. It is in general a proof of a very low IQ so maybe it is not even their fault.

 

[WhatPowerIs]

Because their mind is so small that it cannot understand that the world is made by infinite permutation, desires and tastes. It is in general a proof of a very low IQ so maybe it is not even their fault.

Classy!

 

[hamvil]

Classy!

You fail to understand that there is a difference between saying "I do not like X" and "X is sick", the former is an opinion the latter is a judgment and a discriminatory one.

 

[WhatPowerIs]

You fail to understand that there is a difference between saying "I do not like X" and "X is sick", the former is an opinion the latter is a judgment and a discriminatory one.

Discriminatory? You just called them low IQ in the last post you made.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Discriminatory?

making or showing an unfair or prejudicial distinction between different categories of people or things, especially on the grounds of race, age, or sex.
not agreeing with what they said, thats why i didnt react to it. but its not discriminatory.
the "in general" part could probably be considered, but you pointed out the specific person and thats not possible by definition if it takes a whole group

 

[WhatPowerIs]

making or showing an unfair or prejudicial distinction between different categories of people or things, especially on the grounds of race, age, or sex.
not agreeing with what they said, thats why i didnt react to it. but its not discriminatory.
the "in general" part could probably be considered, but you pointed out the specific person and thats not possible by definition if it takes a whole group

Fair enough but to call somebody low IQ over something like this is a gigantic reach and I don't think I am crazy for saying that lol

 

[hamvil]

making or showing an unfair or prejudicial distinction between different categories of people or things, especially on the grounds of race, age, or sex.
not agreeing with what they said, thats why i didnt react to it. but its not discriminatory.
the "in general" part could probably be considered, but you pointed out the specific person and thats not possible by definition if it takes a whole group

So calling the sexual preference of a group of people unhealthy is not discriminatory? What if I write that homosexual practices are not healthy, would you not consider that discriminatory and offensive?

 

[Life_and_Death]

of a group of people

by definition if it takes a whole group

did you not read what i said?

 

[hamvil]

Discriminatory? You just called them low IQ in the last post you made.

reasoning in black and white like that poster is a trait of people with low IQ. It is not an offense, is like saying a person has blue eyes. There are people with high IQ and people with low IQ.

 

[WhatPowerIs]

reasoning in black and white like that poster is a trait of people with low IQ. It is not an offense, is like saying a person has blue eyes. There are people with high IQ and people with low IQ.

I suppose you can go around and call anybody stupid so as long as they disagree with your worldview, right?

 

[hamvil]

I suppose you can go around and call anybody stupid so as long as they disagree with your worldview, right?

You fail to grasp basic english or you do not know what IQ means. The IQ is a trait of a person, like hair color. Pointing out that a person is blonde is not offensive, point out that a person has probably low IQ is not offensive, it is just how a person is. They did not choose to have a low IQ, nature did. Do not reverse the situation this is not a matter of agreeing with my worldview it is a matter of calling my sexual preference deviant. Moreover you avoided the question I wrote above about the parallel with homosexuality, it seems you like to select the part that is more convenient to you and ignore the rest. That is a very sad behavior.

 

[Life_and_Death]

reasoning in black and white like that poster is a trait of people with low IQ

Black and white thinking is a trait of borderline personality disorder, which I have. I also an average to the lower side of high IQ.
Just because I have a mental disorder doesn't mean I have a low IQ. I'd be more upset by this if you hadn't of previously said

in general

In other words "not always, just a majority"

 

[hamvil]

Black and white thinking is a trait of borderline personality disorder, which I have. I also an average to the lower side of high IQ.
Just because I have a mental disorder doesn't mean I have a low IQ. I'd be more upset by this if you hadn't of previously said

In other words "not always, just a majority"

I think you should read again what I wrote.

 

[Someone123]

You are just proving your ignorance over and over again. You fail to understand what BDSM is yet you spit sentences that make no sense at all. I feel sorry for the small and limited world in which you like your life must be really terrible. Try to open your mind and do not be scared about your sexuality if you ever had any.

Then you should try to articulate it better if you are able to do so.

If you like physically abusing women as part of your sexuality that is sad, and then you resort to insulting people because they don't agree with this very7 sad view that it is ok to abuse anyone in this way. Really disappointing. You should elevate people by how you treat them, and bdsm does not do this.

 

[hamvil]

If you like physically abusing women as part of your sexuality that is sad, and then you resort to insulting people because they don't agree with this very7 sad view that it is ok to abuse anyone in this way. Really disappointing. You should elevate people by how you treat them, and bdsm does not do this.

You do know that there are also women dominatrix and that roles can be reversed? You are a racists because you question the sexual preference of a large group of people. Your IQ is probably just to low to understand this conversation, so I understand it is not your fault.

If you like physically abusing women as part of your sexuality that is sad, and then you resort to insulting people because they don't agree with this very7 sad view that it is ok to abuse anyone in this way. Really disappointing. You should elevate people by how you treat them, and bdsm does not do this.

Out of curiosity where are you from and how old are you?

 

[Someone123]

You do know that there are also women dominatrix and that roles can be reversed? You are a racists because you question the sexual preference of a large group of people. Your IQ is probably just to low to understand this conversation, so I understand it is not your fault.

I know people do this and I do not believe this is healthy either. That low iq comment is so stupid- you make stupid insults rather than to debate a topic in a reasonable, intellectual way, demonstrating your own low intelligence. Do you even know what racist means? This has nothing to do with race? We have a different opinion on this subject, you keep justifying abuse of others, which in my opinion is very sad.

 

[hamvil]

I know people do this and I do not believe this is healthy either. That low iq comment is so stupid- you make stupid insults rather than to debate a topic in a reasonable, intellectual way, demonstrating your own low intelligence. Do you even know what racist means? This has nothing to do with race? We have a different opinion on this subject, you keep justifying abuse of others, which in my opinion is very sad.

Racisms is term is used also in context of discrimination of sexual preferences. You are a very sad being, closed in your prejudice and limited view about the world. Must be so sad to live your life.

 

[Someone123]

So calling the sexual preference of a group of people unhealthy is not discriminatory? What if I write that homosexual practices are not healthy, would you not consider that discriminatory and offensive?

If the sexual prefernece is to hurt someone else then yes, that is very unhealthy.

Racisms is term is used also in context of discrimination of sexual preferences. You are a very sad being, closed in your prejudice and limited view about the world. Must be so sad to live your life.

There is no dictionary that defines racism in this way, and on the long Wikipedia page about racism there is nothing even close to this usage- this is not racism at all, you are demonstarting your own very low intelligence by calling this racism. So sad because I prefer treating people in a healthy way? No, your justifications for abusing others are really sad and not at all reasonable or logical.

 

[hamvil]

If the sexual prefernece is to hurt someone else then yes, that is very unhealthy.

As I said you do not know what BDSM is. Document yourself. There are people that even like pain. Defining them unhealthy is hate speech.

There is no dictionary that defines racism in this way, and on the long Wikipedia page about racism there is nothing even close to this usage- this is not racism at all, you are demonstarting your own very low intelligence by calling this racism. So sad because I prefer treating people in a healthy way? No, your justifications for abusing others are really sad and not at all reasonable or logical.

Yours is hate speech which scientific literature associates to low IQ. You did not even managed to understand the Wikipedia page on racism otherwise you would have seen the link with sexual discrimination.

If the sexual prefernece is to hurt someone else then yes, that is very unhealthy.

There is no dictionary that defines racism in this way, and on the long Wikipedia page about racism there is nothing even close to this usage- this is not racism at all, you are demonstarting your own very low intelligence by calling this racism. So sad because I prefer treating people in a healthy way? No, your justifications for abusing others are really sad and not at all reasonable or logical.

You did not replay about where are you from and your age.