Is anyone upset with their parents for having them?

[Lost Magic]

There is a great community out there btw https://www.stophavingkids.org/who-we-are
Take a look and see what they represent.

 

[Don’tDoxMe]

Yes, but not for angsty philosophical reasons. My mom and stepdad are monsters. My dad is fine though, good even.

 

[dumblosergirl]

I would've rather been aborted tbh. The life I live and had lived is nothing but pain. I hate who I am as a whole. The world is too hard and too cruel. I do not know much about my father and I cut contact with my mother. I have nobody. I don't even know how to navigate life on my own. I feel embarrassed being an adult and not knowing how to be one.

 

[SMmetalhead36]

Hell yeah, because I never asked for life and they never done anything for me, they should have just aborted me.

I would've rather been aborted tbh. The life I live and had lived is nothing but pain. I hate who I am as a whole. The world is too hard and too cruel. I do not know much about my father and I cut contact with my mother. I have nobody. I don't even know how to navigate life on my own. I feel embarrassed being an adult and not knowing how to be one.

Agree!

 

[BardBarrie]

I wish I wasn't born, but I do not blame my parents.
They're both loving, hardworking and loyal people who were just wanted children.

 

[nonanone]

im an antinatalist and pro choice because of this some ppl are simply not qualified to be parents knowing twenty years of never-ending misery could've been pretended thru a simple abortion bringing life into this world when ur not capable of being a parent should be considered a sin

 

[girlsboysthems]

im not mad at them, i just know that they didnt want this child (me) and i didnt want them, thats why the pregnancy was hard and should have been aborted. but no.. now im stuck here.

 

[seph25]

Just imagine our suffering is the result of our parents having fun. That's crazy. But my parents also did nothing wrong.

 

[nyul]

I believe that having children is one of the cruelest actions one can commit in this lifetime. That being said, I am not upset with my parents for having had me. I understand that people have their motivations for making a family.

 

[Woolf]

Wow, I'm surprised at how many are not upset with their parents. I hate my parents for having me. I despise them for the cPTSD I suffer because of them, I despise their whole generation for fucking the younger generations for years to come, I'm insanely jealous of my father for just dropping dead one day last year and I hate my mother for so many reasons, but, the main one, is because she had me in the first place.

 

[todiefor]

No, I'm grateful for life, but I would have done parenting a lot differently than my parents did, I definitely take issue with their philosophy on parenting, I don't think they thought very hard about many things and stuck too rigidly to what they thought made sense. Abandoning your child and going off to live in a different country for 10 years and visiting their child only once during that entire time and then never talking about it and refuse to acknowledge their child's feelings on it even when confronted many times, for example, is one of the things I could never do as a parent . Do I at times feel deep resentment for what they did as parents, yes I do, but not for giving birth to me.

 

[itwillpass]

No, not at all. They didn't know how I would turn out. I've no trauma in my background, it's purely biological luck of the draw. That's not to say I'm glad they had me, wish my mum had a headache that night (or whenever I was created).

 

[SentimentalTrip]

I went through a brief antinatalist phase where I resented them for having brought me to this world, especially because I wasn't the result of a planned pregnancy. But now I cringe at that and I acknowledge that they never could have known I'd grow up to me so depressed.

What I do resent is that they had me, and didn't have the decency to raise me with love or care. They neglected me and abused me psychologically my entire life. They belittled me and told me things you should never tell your child. I started to show signs of depression from a very, very young age and they never took it seriously.

 

[itwillpass]

I will turn this around though - should I have fathered children? The answer to that is no...

 

[Sarz]

I resent my parents, not for being born, but for them having children, when they definitely weren't equipped to take care of us.
They successfully fucked up 4/4 kids. They should not have had children.

Same here..my words exactly. Both dead now..should have sued them for all the shit I've been dealt.

 

[betternever2havbeen]

Most of our parents have no fault for our being unhappy (the majority, some are to blame), but it seems amazing to me that there are people who are angry with their parents for conceiving them. Like ¿How are your parents going to ask you if do you want to be born? The circumstances of the world aren't your parents' fault either. Instead of looking for causes of your unhappiness, try to improve your life (If it is the case that your parents were not responsible of that)

Can't believe the lengths some people go to to defend them. The circumstances of the world aren't the fault of parents? I would argue they very much are, collectively speaking anyway. There is no world without parents, the human world anyway-which is arguably crueller than even the natural world. And they know physical illnesses exist, and pain and suffering, and depression. They are absolutely more at fault than someone who doesn't have kids. And saying we should look to improve our lives assumes there's even anything to get out of life-which to some of us there absolutely isn't. Life itself is the cause of my unhappiness and whose fault is that? Oh yeah mum and dad.

How about people who want to be parents try and improve their life instead of having kids? Find something other than procreating to fill the void, get therapy to help them deal with life without inflicting it on others. Oh yeah that'll never happen. I don't understand why most of us are told to do therapy and this and that and yet parents can create life to try and distract themselves and fix all their problems-and fail miserably at it.

 

[MatrixPrisoner]

People need to wake up and stop having children. All they are doing is producing more slaves to the system for the 1% to take advantage of. It's really mind-boggling to me that there are 250 million people every year that choose to look past this fact.

 

[Hollowman]

I used to but I'm too numb to get upset about anything anymore.

 

[SunnyIsAi]

Can't believe the lengths some people go to to defend them. The circumstances of the world aren't the fault of parents? I would argue they very much are, collectively speaking anyway. There is no world without parents, the human world anyway-which is arguably crueller than even the natural world. And they know physical illnesses exist, and pain and suffering, and depression. They are absolutely more at fault than someone who doesn't have kids. And saying we should look to improve our lives assumes there's even anything to get out of life-which to some of us there absolutely isn't. Life itself is the cause of my unhappiness and whose fault is that? Oh yeah mum and dad.

How about people who want to be parents try and improve their life instead of having kids? Find something other than procreating to fill the void, get therapy to help them deal with life without inflicting it on others. Oh yeah that'll never happen. I don't understand why most of us are told to do therapy and this and that and yet parents can create life to try and distract themselves and fix all their problems-and fail miserably at it.

Bro if you don't like your parents and just want someone to blame, just say it. You only see the bad things of the world, ¿what about the good things? I'm sorry if your parents aren't that great, but blaming someone for bringing you to life is just childish. Some people want kids to make them happy, others don't. But that doesn't mean every parent is bad or every parent is good, we just need to focus on the good, not like you that only wants to blame every single person of the earth

 

[thewalkingdread]

blaming someone for bringing you to life is just childish.

Accusing others of being childish, aside from being a form of ad hominem and appeal to authority fallacies, is often a childish act in itself. Your claim seems to rely on the assumption that you are more mature or adult-like, thereby invalidating others' perspectives based on your perceived authority of age or maturity.

You are clearly being condescending towards those who are justifiably indignant about the harm done to them by being forced into an existence they never asked for. Additionally, you are being lenient towards parents, as if they bear no responsibility in the matter.

the human world anyway-which is arguably crueller than even the natural world.

It indeed is.

 

[betternever2havbeen]

Bro if you don't like your parents and just want someone to blame, just say it. You only see the bad things of the world, ¿what about the good things? I'm sorry if your parents aren't that great, but blaming someone for bringing you to life is just childish. Some people want kids to make them happy, others don't. But that doesn't mean every parent is bad or every parent is good, we just need to focus on the good, not like you that only wants to blame every single person of the earth

My parents were fine, that's not the point, it's not about parental skills. I just fundamentally disagree with having an 80 year experience foisted on me by others. I don't only see the bad, but suffering is part of life, which no one gets to agree to. Fine if you're ok with that I guess (although why you would be is beyond me) I've seen too many people suffer horribly. Why wouldn't you prevent that if you could? And at the end of it all we just go back to non-existence so even if you enjoyed it you know it'll all be taken away from you in the end. If I could happily ignore all the suffering in the world I probably wouldn't have ended up on this website...

 

[Nagito]

I remember as a kid I asked my dad why he had me thinking he would say bc he wanted me. He said it was bc him and my mom were young, dumb, and full of cum lol.

My parents were in and out of my life as a kid and it's so hard for me to not see them as evil for bringing a kid they couldn't take care of into this world just because they were teenagers and horny. I need to remind myself they were just stupid horny teenagers probably imagining an idealistic future.

I try to comfort myself with knowing I will never bring someone into this world and risk them ending up like so many of us.

 

[alltoomuch2]

No, I'm upset with what they did to me when I was growing up, and that they have never mentioned or acknowledged what they did and the damage it did. And the way my remaining parent (my mother) expects us to run around her and acts like a victim, when she ruined my life.

 

[sserafim]

I'm mad at them for bringing me into existence without my consent, into a world where I eventually will have to become a wageslave just to survive. Life is slavery and work is modern day slavery. I'm angry about the fact that I didn't get a choice. I didn't even get the right to decline or say no; it happened against my will

 

[thewalkingdread]

I wish I could "unparent" us all.

 

[Qua]

I once saw someone say something like this: "you can't love yourself when you're the outcome of two people who couldn't love each other either" and I couldn't relate more. I hate the fact that I've been born into a family where all they could do for me is traumatize me

 

[sensitiveguy]

I used to but not anymore. I don't hold any grudge.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

I love them but I also kind of resent them for giving birth to me, but what can you do?

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I'm mad at them for bringing me into existence without my consent, into a world where I eventually will have to become a wageslave just to survive. Life is slavery and work is modern day slavery. I'm angry about the fact that I didn't get a choice. I didn't even get the right to decline or say no; it happened against my will

Same here to all of this

 

[Marie France]

Oui, une partie de moi est en colère contre eux pour m'avoir donné naissance et m'avoir élevé dans un environnement très négatif.