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sundown12

sundown12

Member
Oct 5, 2022
70
hi everyone, I'm 28F from Europe. i'm clairaudient and very much into spirituality. i can also channel beings - I'm not great at it, but I'm learning. people around me think i'm schizophrenic, and control and abuse me. i love music more than anything. i bought myself a midi keyboard recently, but haven't gotten to actually learning music. i used to be an artist, and lately I've been trying to get back into making art. tried to ctb once, but wasn't properly informed about correct methods, so I ended up in a psych ward for a short time. everyone around me is a psychotic control freak, and I'm just trying to survive one day at a time. thank you for reading this and wishing you a good day☁️
 
ChantDuCygne

ChantDuCygne

Member
Aug 23, 2023
24
Hello. I don’t know how specific I should be. My father committed ctb when I was ten years old, so my feeling of safety was shattered rather early on (when I compare myself to the other kids who were in my class back then). I apologize ahead of time if this ends up being confusing. I’m very bad at explaining things. I have two younger siblings. Knowing this is important to understand what comes next. Following my father’s passing, my mother sent me to a boarding school under the pretext that I was not a healthy influence on my siblings. While I was away, my mother met a man who she liked. I don’t want to say too much so I will try to keep things short. She brought the man home and he gradually started taking over the family. This man would later redefine my definition of freedom, as he denied all of me and enforced his own feelings, opinions and ideals on me. I’ve been his puppet for years. I gave up on myself. I feel like a stranger, no matter where I go. I don’t understand people and people don’t understand me. As for my family… I can’t say I don’t care about them, because I would already be dead if that were the case. We just don’t get along very well. I hope this much is okay. I tried my best to keep it simple.
 
ClaudeCTTE

ClaudeCTTE

Nowhere to go...
Aug 22, 2023
45
Hello, I'm 20 years old and I'm from Latin America.
I'm a guy who was diagnosed with ADHD, depression and "complex misanthropy".
I'm not usually a very social person and I'm not interested in making friends irl (sometimes I've thought if I'm schizoid).
I come from a tough family, a family that doesn't understand my thoughts: a father who denies that I have a mental disorder, a brother with autism and another one obsessed with money.
In high school I was very lonely and was always called a weirdo for no apparent reason.
I dropped out college due to my depression and I'm currently a NEET.
In my free time I listen to the same music over and over again and I read random articles on Wikipedia.
I rarely play video games.
About ctb, maybe it will happen in a very long time...
 
A

Andro_USYD

Artificially happy on medicine
Jul 1, 2023
96
Hello I'm Jake. I'm doing a major in philosophy and a minor in computer science, once I finish my bachelor's I'm gonna go onto a master's degree studying the existence of God. I'm keeping good grades rn but I am prone to boredom a lot and for this reason I often vape and sometimes smoke. I'm a believer in kratom as being a remedy for people to feel better as it's truly helped me. I've been on this forum for a while now and think if Ur in trouble I'd be a good person to talk to. I'm not against CTB but can give U some tips to make life less insufferable
 
B

benzol

Member
Aug 26, 2023
40
Hello,

I suffer from a very loud tinnitus since last year.
This made me fell into a deep depression. After a worsening in February, I knew that thus level is too much and that I will need to CTB.
Found already lots of good advices lurking, and am now member.
 
carseatheadrest_223

carseatheadrest_223

miss him
Aug 27, 2023
6
Hello!!!

U can call me woe!!
Im going through a pretty bad break up and I have no motivation to get better !!!

so here i am! i hope we can all have wonderful connections here. if anyone wants to talk, send a message !!! idk if i can talk yet tho…
 
A

aetherless

Member
Aug 27, 2023
13
Hello!
A lot of people call me Noodle, but you can call me whatever you want. I used to enjoy doing a lot of things. I've lost everything I have built for 7 years and have been motivated to bounce back. But I miss my woods, I miss my animals... I miss the quiet. But I'm grinding away in the city and its killed my soul. I'm an addict of multiple things and I have been withered to the point I don't even know what anxiety is. I'm reckless and careless. I'm not sad. I'm miserably numb. I'm never happy. I have always had suicidal tendencies since I could remember. But it never surfaced as much as it has now that I'm 30. I searched desperately after a failed attempt of hanging myself and I found this oasis. And for once in a long time, I feel a glimmer of hope. A relief to know such a place exists for us.
 
90SecondsToMidnight

90SecondsToMidnight

WandererOfPurgatory
Aug 30, 2023
4
Hello everyone,

I'm just a random 18 year old nobody, but feel free to call me Eno, Midnight, Or whatever honestly idc. I like talking and generally just listening to what others have to say. Socializing through video games is often for me ( mostly Minecraft [Java], MW3, Apex, Battlefield 1, And every now and then Fortnite. Note however, I suck at them all, I just play for fun. Feel free to PM me or inv me to play games if you're in the need of someone or just bored. Idk What else to say so there you go.

Have A Day!
 
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リンさん

リンさん

I don’t feel pain when I’m with you • she/her
Sep 9, 2023
113
Hey!

I’m one of the very unfortunate people who got their account deleted due to the recent data loss, so here I am again, lol. Now with the proper introduction.

I am Rina. I’m in my 20ies, I am someone who (privately, obviously) researches suicide for personal means. As someone who is mentally ill, I am a big proponent for both assisted suicide being widely available, as well as proper education regarding humane methods of CTBing which can be used by individuals.

My hobbies are pretty boring, I do design work for living, love learning languages (English not being my native one, lol) and overall chatting with cool humans. I am, admittedly, somewhat addicted to gacha games and am a fan of anime/Japanese culture. I love reading, but having ADHD makes it extremely hard sometimes, so I usually end up indulging in great stories interwoven with either games or visual novels.

Nice to meet you all :)
 
Seered Doom

Seered Doom

A nihilist going through an unrelinquished Hell
Sep 9, 2023
195
Hello, I'm Seered Doom. You may call me Seer or Doom or any nickname you wish. I like to write and make art. I have many mental illnesses and am autistic. I may be descriptive with my detailed explanations of things, but please tell me if it's too far
 
muddyman

muddyman

sapphire bullet of pure love
Oct 24, 2020
42
hi. i guess ill go by chug here. reasons being: alcohol was my first love (unless you count experimenting w/ inhalants) i sign my posts fay terrier x hare hound bcuz of we are all dogs just hunting rats & rabbits

im 22. ive been suicidal as long as i can remember. idk if people remember the MDA telethon that jerry dude did, but like i was one of those kids growing up. weird to grow up with everyone always acting and talking to you like youre dying and watching your friends with similar disorders die and stuff, kinda messes with your view of death. but if you think that sounds like baggage, wait until i bring up my late partner, at the worst possible moment of course, so lets save that fun scene for later.

ive got a fun cocktail of nonspecific neuromuscular disorder (they call it CMT/muscular dystrophy for now), autism, CPTSD, DID, schizophrenia, and general traumatic brain damage (TBIs). gotta love those seizures & hallucinations & muscle atrophy & delusions & chronic pain & paranoia & watching it all get worse every day as you loose more and more abilitiies, but i also got an even more fun cocktail (cause this ones not metaphorical) of substances to kinda equalize everything and keep it all in check. plus like cancer rates are going up for younger people, i dont want to pass on my genetic into anyway, so its the sex drugs rock&roll path for me for a bit, while tie some stuff up with the missus (they wont mind theyre dead haha)

im a transgender man (he/him), but im more of a femboy. i look masculine for comfort, feminine for looking fancy. tbh i consider myself a crossdresser, no different from any other dude in a dress. also i say im a "partygurl" cause girls get in free to parties lol

i like writing and multimedia art. i used to be a film major before i dropped out. i like low budget movies and art direction and my favorite movies are monkeybone and who framed roger rabbit. so i mostly just watch tv, since i dont want to make most art anymore since i no longer live in a world with my love in it. writing, drawing, anything, especially music & filmmaking stuff, i dont want to do any of it without them in the world, i just want to keep doing drugs to feel what he felt. ( tbh thats my other hobby lol i really like drugs)

19+ preferred?? other than that pls hmu lets chat i love sci fi and comedy and bbc and lost media and idk i have a lot of interests im autstic ok? lol
 
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kitsix

kitsix

back from the dead!!!! (for now)
Sep 9, 2023
38
failed an sn attempt with 0 permanent damage somehow. back from the dead motherfuckers.
jk
anyways I'm a medical student (so depression comes with the trade)
got majorly fucked over socially which completely wrecked my mental health
am gonna try to leave again
:)
 
Average Enthusiast

Average Enthusiast

Member
Sep 10, 2023
9
Hi everyone,
I'm 18m from Ireland. Been in a rough place mentally for a couple yrs and came across this site. I love music(Gambino, Weeknd, Deftones, etc.), gaming, movies and TV shows. I also love sports like Soccer and UFC. Getting my first tattoo this Thursday so something for me to look forward to 🙌
 
EternalPain

EternalPain

To live means to suffer
Sep 11, 2023
20
Hello everyone,
I'm in constant mental agony. Been depressed since my memories started.
I like music, some shows (Bojack Horseman, Breaking Bad, Arcane) videogames (Fav are Overwatch, Portal, Horizon Zero Dawn and Minecraft), and obessing about substances and fictional characters (f.e. Zero Two, Mary Saotome, Moira O´deorain).
I am unsure what I am and constantly change my mind so don't count on any of this all the time, idk.
If someone has similar interests, please talk to me.
Thanks for reading! <3
 
duwangJEff

duwangJEff

Member
Sep 12, 2023
28
Hello, I'm new here

For starters, I do feel like a bit of a poser here, since I'm not properly suicidal. I tend to feel very isolated and alone, and I experience quite a bit of suicidal ideation from time to time. I'm also a 22/m virgin, and I've never had a proper girlfriend, and it seems like there's no way to find one. I long for a romantic and sexual connection with someone, but there is nothing for me.

I'm still young, so I haven't lost hope, hence why I say I'm not properly suicidal... but if something doesn't change in my life soon, I will likely CTB.

For now, I'm here because I find this forum interesting, and I want to find a way to talk to similar people and feel less isolated
 
E

eternal.peace

Member
Sep 15, 2023
32
Hi all. I previously introduced myself but my post was lost with the data loss.

31F in the USA. I’ve lurked here in the past, but am now properly a member. I’ve struggled with suicidal ideation most of my life, in addition to ptsd, an eating disorder, anxiety, and depression. My depression and anhedonia have progressively worsened this year to the point where I feel like I can’t function. Just hoping to be able to connect with some like-minded folks here. I’ve had cbt attempts in the past but they were either more impulsive, or I was uninformed of lethality of methods. I’m not sure what else to say other than it’s rough out here 😅

I’ve lost interest in most things and have lost my spark/sense of passion. But I do love cats and my two sweet cats give me some sense of comfort. Thanks for reading <3
 
su1c1dal-dungeon

su1c1dal-dungeon

depressed rat
Sep 15, 2023
19
hi - long term lurker here.
im a 21 y/o female from the US and im obviously suicidal!
ive been in and out of crisis since 13 and also in and out of therapy at the same age. ive attempted once and sadly woke up the next day - i didnt tell anyone because failing was fucking embarrassing as you can imagine (or know).
anyway - i have a bachelors degree in psychology and im currently working towards becoming a psychiatric nurse we’ll see if i get there.
its nice to be here<3
 
Ligand

Ligand

Member
Sep 14, 2023
46
Hello, I'm a male in my mid-20s from the United States. I have a biology degree, had a pretty awesome life, and was planning on getting a PhD, but my health started to deteriorate rapidly a few years ago. I have a few rare conditions (2 are progressive), constant chronic pain, and my quality of life has declined significantly every year for the past few years.

I'm not sure how long I'm going to stick around, but I'm hoping I can eventually find some people here that have similar experiences to me or that are going through similar situations that I can connect with. Illness can be very isolating, so it is comforting to be able to find places like this where I can talk about the less fun aspects of life without being censored. I look forward to my time here.