I do understand having these fears, especially the one of surviving a suicide attempt and ending up with damage. I just hate how suicide has to be so difficult and risky for us, it's just so cruel how as humans we are denied a peaceful and straightforward way to exit this existence without suffering in the process, if had a method like Nembutal I would be long gone at this point.
But yes, it sounds beyond horrific failing a suicide attempt and ending up in a situation of way worse torture, I just think the fact that reliable methods are restricted and how we are expected to just suffer no matter what proves that this world really is hell.