Ksmиda
Will I die too soon or live too long?
- Oct 23, 2023
- 175
Planning to ctb soon (~1 month), it's just hit me how I'm going to risk everything on the day. All the years that I've successfully hidden my depression and acted "happy" could all go to waste in only a few hours if I fail. My whole life would be changed for the worse. I've had multiple unnervingly realistic nightmares where I try to ctb but just can't die. I really have to hope my sn is pure and that I don't mess anything up on the day, surviving would be traumatising. Just wanted to write my thoughts down.