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Fragile

Fragile

Broken
Jul 7, 2019
1,496
My mental health is treatment resistant, there is no cure for my genetic disorder and the pain is becoming unbearable, i have issues with drug addiction, tinnitus is getting worse and i'm also loosing my sight.

So I decided that i will fight for one last year, giving it my all. maybe a miracle will happen and i'll be able to live a bit longer, but i know for a fact that I will CTB before i hit 30 even if everything goes my way.
In the meantime i'll also try to get a very peaceful and reliable method to CTB, this will act as a safety net so I can try everything and still know that there is another way, plus my last dream is to die peacefully.

Starting next month i'll get surgery to treat some health issues, recover and move away from my relatives and then start to distance myself from them, maybe this will reduce their pain once i'm truly gone.

I can't really work so i'll try to get back into art, this was once a dream that my health issues killed, but maybe i'll be able to leave something beautiful behind.

There is so much that I want to accomplish, but my mind just jumps from hope to despair, I'm being realistic with my goals and I'm still a long way from making peace with my reality, but I'm making progress and even if i fail, I'll know that I tried.

Thanks for reading.
 
P

pole

Global Mod
Sep 18, 2018
1,377
My mental health is treatment resistant, there is no cure for my genetic disorder and the pain is becoming unbearable, i have issues with drug addiction, tinnitus is getting worse and i'm also loosing my sight.

So I decided that i will fight for one last year, giving it my all. maybe a miracle will happen and i'll be able to live a bit longer, but i know for a fact that I will CTB before i hit 30 even if everything goes my way.
In the meantime i'll also try to get a very peaceful and reliable method to CTB, this will act as a safety net so I can try everything and still know that there is another way, plus my last dream is to die peacefully.

Starting next month i'll get surgery to treat some health issues, recover and move away from my relatives and then start to distance myself from them, maybe this will reduce their pain once i'm truly gone.

I can't really work so i'll try to get back into art, this was once a dream that my health issues killed, but maybe i'll be able to leave something beautiful behind.

There is so much that I want to accomplish, but my mind just jumps from hope to despair, I'm being realistic with my goals and I'm still a long way from making peace with my reality, but I'm making progress and even if i fail, I'll know that I tried.

Thanks for reading.
amazing to hear. hope you accomplish what you set out and seek in accomplishing; all while making peace with yourself and life in the process.

wish you the best of luck.
 
IsadoraBeauxdraps

IsadoraBeauxdraps

would like to follow that butterfly
Aug 23, 2019
160
My mental health is treatment resistant, there is no cure for my genetic disorder and the pain is becoming unbearable, i have issues with drug addiction, tinnitus is getting worse and i'm also loosing my sight.

So I decided that i will fight for one last year, giving it my all. maybe a miracle will happen and i'll be able to live a bit longer, but i know for a fact that I will CTB before i hit 30 even if everything goes my way.
In the meantime i'll also try to get a very peaceful and reliable method to CTB, this will act as a safety net so I can try everything and still know that there is another way, plus my last dream is to die peacefully.

Starting next month i'll get surgery to treat some health issues, recover and move away from my relatives and then start to distance myself from them, maybe this will reduce their pain once i'm truly gone.

I can't really work so i'll try to get back into art, this was once a dream that my health issues killed, but maybe i'll be able to leave something beautiful behind.

There is so much that I want to accomplish, but my mind just jumps from hope to despair, I'm being realistic with my goals and I'm still a long way from making peace with my reality, but I'm making progress and even if i fail, I'll know that I tried.

Thanks for reading.
Hi Fragile,
I feel so close to what you have written. Me too I would like to draw again and leave something beautiful behind me, in order to die in peace.
I really hope that you will find something to get better, I hope your surgery will be successful.
Your avatar, is it a drawing from you ? What would you like to do in art ?
Hugs :heart:
 
Fragile

Fragile

Broken
Jul 7, 2019
1,496
Hi Fragile,
I feel so close to what you have written. Me too I would like to draw again and leave something beautiful behind me, in order to die in peace.
I really hope that you will find something to get better, I hope your surgery will be successful.
Your avatar, is it a drawing from you ? What would you like to do in art ?
Hugs :heart:

Thanks, sadly this drawing is not mine, i never got to that level.

for the moment i just want to get better at drawing in general, then i may try to write and draw a graphic novel just because i really wanted to do that at some point in my life.
 
Sweet emotion

Sweet emotion

Enlightened
Sep 14, 2019
1,325
My mental health is treatment resistant, there is no cure for my genetic disorder and the pain is becoming unbearable, i have issues with drug addiction, tinnitus is getting worse and i'm also loosing my sight.

So I decided that i will fight for one last year, giving it my all. maybe a miracle will happen and i'll be able to live a bit longer, but i know for a fact that I will CTB before i hit 30 even if everything goes my way.
In the meantime i'll also try to get a very peaceful and reliable method to CTB, this will act as a safety net so I can try everything and still know that there is another way, plus my last dream is to die peacefully.

Starting next month i'll get surgery to treat some health issues, recover and move away from my relatives and then start to distance myself from them, maybe this will reduce their pain once i'm truly gone.

I can't really work so i'll try to get back into art, this was once a dream that my health issues killed, but maybe i'll be able to leave something beautiful behind.

There is so much that I want to accomplish, but my mind just jumps from hope to despair, I'm being realistic with my goals and I'm still a long way from making peace with my reality, but I'm making progress and even if i fail, I'll know that I tried.

Thanks for reading.
You should be very proud of yourself and I want you to know how strong you are. I wish you the best of luck at starting a new life.
 
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