Venting I wish I could express myself

[barely_afloat]

I can't ever express the way I want to feel. I want to cry, but I can't cry. I want to open up to someone, but I'm ignored by everyone. I just wish I mattered enough to have even one word heard. I don't want to pretend that everything is alright. I just want to feel human. Just for a day. I wish I wasn't socially inept. I hate myself. How much longer do I have to live like this? My brain is so cruel. Feeding me lies that things will get better. Why am I alive? I hate feeling like this all the damn time.

 

[Sutter]

Expression.

Often wandering a soul with reason or an aimless but intuitive sense like feeling and drinking the grain pattern of time that is a held breath before something is made of it or it is consumed.

Seems to me the world makes us and we make the world. Have moments though where not always sure it's either or but an intention of the two. Different measures to all of us and not fair to those who needed a smidge more or less.

Hopeful you find what you need in a way you want it. As said above you stand in a room with many others.

As for an expression, well some of me died and when those parts did grief visited and took more than it should, curse, a gift, just a loss? Don't know, begs a wandering thought if there is a bone crafter that runs a feeling over my own grains will it be a beauty to be seen or an aberration to be fed to the fire, whatever is seen it won't be fair. Maybe just tossed to the sea barely afloat before dark waters.

Not alone in how you feel.

 

[FoxSauce]

Don't blame yourself for holding out for hope even we're isnt any, we just do , it was makes us human.

I dont think you should be hard on yourself how you express yourself theres no one way to express love , happiness and sort of things

However if you cant you could be emotionally numb? (Im just assuming sorry) From experience ik how you feel , its hard to sometimes feel something even trying to smile seems like a chore.


Hope you have a good day

 

[COMA]

If i was in your place i would try therapy. You can really express yourself and share your pain with therapist. Also i feel very sorry that you are feeling this way. Sending you Hugs