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Enlightened
Apr 8, 2020
1,919
At 25 in 2022 my life was at an all time high with great things happening for me and for once things were beautifully coming together.

I had the most amazing time in Italy then weeks later I gave my strongest ever interview performance when I came back to the UK. I got the job. The salary was great it was an increase from my last job. I fell in love with an older man in his 50s because he just made me feel so special and it was great finally having a man see me while guys my own age ignored me and all my life I have been that girl now woman who never gets picked and always ignored and overlooked. He turned out to be a horrible two faced man who has caused me enormous heartbreak which is not going away.

Winter it was snowing in my city and across the UK. During my lunch break I took a stroll in the snow and it was so magical because my life was finally coming together and I was looking forward to the future. For the first time I wanted to live. Christmas was just amazing. I brought so many gifts for my family household with my work salary. The living room was full of presents I brought my family.

Last year in 2023 it all came crashing down rapidly the beautiful life I had. Its so embrassing that I will be starting a masters degree at 27 all because of family financial issues left me unable to pay tuition fees I actually resent my mother for always sending money back home to help our selfish user relatives who live overseas ( African country). I feel so far behind compared to everyone else my age. It so hard seeing women I grew up with getting married while I am constantly unsuccessful with men and seeing everyone else having careers while I got fired.

I look back at old photos in 2022 because I will never have those great times again in my life. I really wanted to live and fought to improve my life but now I am done fighting. I don't want to live for the next 20 years and more. Life is nothing but a game and I done playing.
 
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