I think, most of us wanna live to its full extent but just can't

[ardacalvin]

It's just some observation, it can't and shouldn't hold for all of us -- as there are thousand reasons to die-- but in my short time here on this website I realized an interesting fact which maybe many of you so far noticed but at least now I realized and, that is, many of you (including me) really wanna live this life to its full extent. By which I mean to its "genuine fullest" extent. (not like in a hedonist context but rather some kind of comprehensiveness which is not possible to be fully described by our current language --as Wittgenstein said what can be said at all can be said clearly, and what we cannot talk about we must pass over in silence-- which is why it is actually unattainable inherently.)
What we really want is not death "itself" but rather the life in its this fullness, what our desires are mostly calling for, before death, is this unattainable fullness. But I'm still not sure about if it is due to the causality or correlation. I mean, do we really wanna die and are so depressed because of this unattainability or because we are so depressed we are depriving ourselves of will to live thereby overplaying this unattainability? Even though it may sound trivial, say even petty, musing over this question(even if there is no true answer for it) may be helpful to some extent for those, like me, unable to denominate the real cause in our daily struggles. Even we might die tomorrow, what to lose anyway :D
Because, unlike most psychiatrist, I choose not to accept their down-to-earth materialistic and reductionist theories about depression and cognition before I die. I'm not saying I can name and know more but at least I know it's not very low-dimensional like only consisting of fucked-up childhood and genes.

 

[Superdeterminist]

Yes, personally I would prefer a good experience over no experience at all. And from my experience I can tell there is potential for great joy in this life. But, there are so, so, many problems to resolve, so many issues which ruin lives and destroy happiness and hope. It's going to take a lot of work.

 

[Anthagonos]

Same here...

 

[Ghost2211]

I would be good with content. I don't even need life to be super amazing. I set the bar pretty low, safety.

 

[ardacalvin]

Yes, personally I would prefer a good experience over no experience at all. And from my experience I can tell there is potential for great joy in this life. But, there are so, so, many problems to resolve, so many issues which ruin lives and destroy happiness and hope. It's going to take a lot of work.

Even though you are right, what I mean here is a bit different than what you hint. To be more specific, even though you have your all problems solved and also have great hopes for the short run, in the end you will still have this problem (at least I will) because of this unattainability and that is what evolutionary psychologist call "genes" or psychoanalysts "early childhood" and what most of us call inner voices that just don't shut the fuck up. What I try to question is if it is so to stay because of our "obsession" (this the most appropriate word I think of) with a life to its full extent.

I would be good with content. I don't even need life to be super amazing. I set the bar pretty low, safety.

I don't know you but if in this life your only expectation from life is safety, then you must have a really worse one than most of us and I hope you are really fine other than in terms of your mental health.

 

[BPD Barbie]

I'd love to continue living but I'm so trapped by so many things that I cant see a way out or forward.

 

[Superdeterminist]

Even though you are right, what I mean here is a bit different than what you hint. To be more specific, even though you have your all problems solved and also have great hopes for the short run, in the end you will still have this problem (at least I will) because of this unattainability and that is what evolutionary psychologist call "genes" or psychoanalysts "early childhood" and what most of call inner voices that just don't shut the fuck up. What I try to question is if it is so to day because of our "obsession" (this the most appropriate word I think of) with a life to its full extent.

I take your point, although I consider this just another issue to be resolved, an issue which we have barely begun to understand. All mental issues, such as self-doubt, the issue of humans growing unsatisfied with what they have even though they may have plenty, the ceaseless striving for more, the inability to achieve permanent contentment, are ultimately neurological. Obviously, it's useful to have desires in order to motivate goal achievement, and it really has been the engine of our progress, but it's not a perfect system - it can and does go wrong, and it's not always useful to have. It seems clear by now that the mind is the product of the brain and therefore to solve problems of the mind, the brain must first be understood. Some will say this can't be done but the naysayers of the past have consistently been disproved, I doubt the mind will be an exception. Besides, if there really is no hope for understanding leading to better lives, what hope is there?

 

[Eren]

I agree. In my personal case I simply feel a lot of suffering (emotional and physical) but very little reward, I feel that it is not worth fighting.

If they took away my autism (which is impossible) maybe it would be worth it.

 

[Ghost2211]

.I don't know you but if in this life your only expectation from life is safety, then you must have a really worse one than most of us and I hope you are really fine other than in terms of your mental health.

I'm not that different from any other 50s housewife that realizes her husband isn't all sunshine and roses but he has all the financial control. He's not physically hurting me or the kids, but if he walked away our whole world would crash to nothing (which is a very real potential now). It's not fun living with that fear every day.

 

[Lupgevif]

Yes, I do want a fullfilling life. But for that to happen, the entire structure of human society should change. So, not happening. Other than that, I can't think of anything I'd want with our planet in this current state.

 

[ardacalvin]

I'm not that different from any other 50s housewife that realizes her husband isn't all sunshine and roses but he has all the financial control. He's not physically hurting me or the kids, but if he walked away our whole world would crash to nothing (which is a very real potential now). It's not fun living with that fear every day.

It sounds really cruel.

 

[moonangel18]

Not every one has the privilege to live their life to the fullest. Some people are stuck with situation they cannot control. I, for example, has the ability to live my life the way I want to, but then again, for some *f**in reason, the universe is selfish enough to allow me to. You see, I live in a country where family should always be the priority over your own happiness. My mom is sick, like almost always, doesn't listen to the doctor and does not like to take her meds on time. I just felt betrayed for the fact that this illness can be controlled by medications but she just does not want to take it regularly. I got stuck here. I feel like my parents doesnt want us to be free and enjoy our own life. They want us to take care of them forever. They dont have insurance, no money, no savings. All their medical expenses and other expenses were being paid by their children. They expect us to return the things they gave for us. They expect their children to care for them forever.

We cant get married. Can't travel. Can't move out because we are also thinking of them. They are lucky that they got married at a young age. They were able to live their life to the fullest.

I'm 31 and I don't even have my own life.
And maybe that is one of the reason why I want to ctb so bad. Freedom.

I just want to be free from this unfair world.
Like, why can't all of us be given the chance to live our life the way we want to?

And that's also the reason why I cant ctb because my parents depends on us. I feel that I'm too selfish to do that.

And that, my friend, is why not everyone can live their life to the fullest. The way they want them to.

 

[VIBRITANNIA]

i don't think a person can be one hundred percent satisfied with their life. we always focus on what we don't have rather than what we do have. like Lupgevif said, if life is to be truly satisfying, then society as we know it must fall. i doubt we could attain the lives we dream of even if society did fall.

 

[Meditation guide]

There is this theory that you can be happy no matter what life has handed you. Just because you choose to be. Instead of always thinking you wish things were different so therefore you are miserable, stop doing that and determine to be happy. I know it sounds ridiculous but really who else is in control of that than us?