I think it's all worthless

[kuroshimi]

Recently I am thinking about giving another shot to therapy. When I came to psychiatrist in last year, right away I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety and prescribed meds. I told about my suicidal ideation, attempts and generally how I feel. At some point I started feeling worse along with negative side effects and changed the treatment plan (just started to take another meds) and started to feel better overall.

Now I am not taking any medications. I feel terrible about my life again. Just don't want to live in this despair. And I don't see myself in future, I'm not even sure it will be.

But at the same time I don't really ready to die. Although I began preparing myself to ctb, I still have some hope that I will get my life in order. And I should probably try to get therapy once again.

On other side, I don't think it makes much sense. The world is declining rapidly every time and I don't want to observe this. Therapy won't fix the world state, therapy won't heal the wound from my childhood traumatic experience. Therapy won't reduce my worries about future. At least that what I think.

I am not sure if it's even get better, I don't see any other variants.

 

[Dr.Duck]

Maybe that can be your test to see if you're ready to die. You can try therapy and if that doesn't work I'm sorry. But if it works you'll finally take the steps to your dreams. Help improve your social life (idk your social life I'm just guessing). Hope you find peace in any of your decisions.

 

[Blueberry Panic]

I went through the therapy/try to get better routine a few times and it all depends on you as a person ... it's definitely not for everyone but I hope you're able to get better, you seem like a really interesting person .

 

[kuroshimi]

Bump.

 

[ObsidianWatcher]

Therapy and medication helped me, but that road is going to look different for everyone. Personally I always think it's worth a try. Much like with medication, if you don't connect with a therapist or don't feel their methods are helpful, you can just switch. There's no limit to the number of therapists you can try until one resonates with you.