Venting I need to die right now

[themisfit]

I've been severely depressed for years, but lately my mental pain has become unbearable

I need to die right now, but I don't have any method available

I'm working almost every day, which makes things worse

There's nothing more I can say to my family, my psychiatrist or my psychologist. There's no medication I can take. There's nothing I can do

I'm just going crazy. I'm going to jump against a train on my way back home out of complete desperation

Help

 

[Widow39]

I don't think this should be done "right now" impulsively but more after being well thought about

 

[whorror]

Jumping in front of a train is not a good idea, imo. It's hard to overcome the SI with this method. And I also don't want to traumatize the driver nor the passagers

 

[discernment]

Please just try to hang on a little bit longer. Focus on getting through this particular moment without acting on the thoughts, I know it feels really intense but this isn't a decision that you should make 'in the moment' when you're at crisis point. You are welcome to message me if you would like to.

 

[themisfit]

Jumping in front of a train is not a good idea, imo. It's hard to overcome the SI with this method. And I also don't want to traumatize the driver nor the passagers

You're right mate. I wasn't gonna do it anyway. My aim was to give you an idea of how much pain I'm feeling…

I don't think this should be done "right now" impulsively but more after being well thought about

I agree. Actually, I wasn't thinking about doing it right now, impulsively. My aim was more to share my desperation with you

But I must say I've thought very well about it, at least for the last decade…

 

[Dandelion's]

I feel you currently I am on vacay away from prying eyes, I am more sane then usual but that's temporary.

 

[themisfit]

Please just try to hang on a little bit longer. Focus on getting through this particular moment without acting on the thoughts, I know it feels really intense but this isn't a decision that you should make 'in the moment' when you're at crisis point. You are welcome to message me if you would like to.

You're right bro. Actually, I wasn't thinking about doing it right now, but rather just express the amount of pain I'm feeling

 

[Tired_birth_1967]

Me too. But I've been going through this for decades, and I'm still here. When there was nothing left to say to the psychiatrist, the psychologist, or anyone else (twenty years ago), I finally realized what my life would be like: sad most of the time, surviving purely due to biological programming. I don't see any merit in that—perhaps just a forced acceptance of who I am, like any other species inhabiting Earth. I can't help you, but if taking your own life feels impossible, I am proof that we can keep going even when we don't want to. What for? For nothing. Just to die when the body starts to fail, like everyone else. I don't know how much pain a person can endure. If I'm here, it's because all the pain I feel isn't enough to overcome my biological programming. Maybe that will change tomorrow, or in months or years—or maybe not. On the other hand, there's no guarantee that staying alive will mean ending up like me. Maybe you'll find something that makes you want to live; maybe in the future you'll think, "It wasn't a good idea to think about throwing myself in front of a train."

 

[DeathSweetDeath]

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