Please i done want to live anymore this mind is a prison. Im only 19 i should be wishing for better things but i have lost all hope. I dont care what happens to me anymore. Just let me die let me fucking kill myself i cant take this shit anymore im so done im so tired.
All of my dreams are gone. I wanted to become a famous painter who spreads love and meaning through my paintings i had so much potential why did no one notice me?? Was i not good enough? Its all my fault im stuck here. Why is my own mind torturing me.
After my mom caught me, she told me if i killed myself she and my dad would live like living corpses. But what about me. I died a long time ago but no one noticed. Why didn't anyone notice me. There were so many signs. But no one noticed. When i withdrew from my friends and dove myself into my studies everyone said i was doing too much. Why didnt they think about WHY why why.
Maybe i should've asked for help earlier maybe I should've reached out to my friends maybe I should have fucking killed myself 5 years ago.
I dont feel like i exist. Im not even real. This existence cannot be real. This is a fucking joke. When i die everything will die with me. None of this is real. How can it be? What even is real?
Please let me die tonight. If i cant have anything else please just let me end my existence let me have just this one thing . I wont ask for more just let me die i dont want anything else god just fucking kill me i need to die im gonna go crazy why is this happening to me what did I deserve to live with my miserable mind. I tried so hard to get myself out of this i really thought i could beat depression i was so fucking naive but this is too much i cant even cry anymore not matter how sad i am the tears just wont come i want to die just let me end this pain once and for all
All of my dreams are gone. I wanted to become a famous painter who spreads love and meaning through my paintings i had so much potential why did no one notice me?? Was i not good enough? Its all my fault im stuck here. Why is my own mind torturing me.
After my mom caught me, she told me if i killed myself she and my dad would live like living corpses. But what about me. I died a long time ago but no one noticed. Why didn't anyone notice me. There were so many signs. But no one noticed. When i withdrew from my friends and dove myself into my studies everyone said i was doing too much. Why didnt they think about WHY why why.
Maybe i should've asked for help earlier maybe I should've reached out to my friends maybe I should have fucking killed myself 5 years ago.
I dont feel like i exist. Im not even real. This existence cannot be real. This is a fucking joke. When i die everything will die with me. None of this is real. How can it be? What even is real?
Please let me die tonight. If i cant have anything else please just let me end my existence let me have just this one thing . I wont ask for more just let me die i dont want anything else god just fucking kill me i need to die im gonna go crazy why is this happening to me what did I deserve to live with my miserable mind. I tried so hard to get myself out of this i really thought i could beat depression i was so fucking naive but this is too much i cant even cry anymore not matter how sad i am the tears just wont come i want to die just let me end this pain once and for all
