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Pardoe84

Pardoe84

Student
Jul 2, 2023
135
I cannot ctb because of my mom. My dad said she would bot survive it. What can i do? I feel like a prisoner in life. I have a very good relationship to my parents.
 
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Tobacco

Tobacco

Efilist. Possible promortalist.
Jan 14, 2023
202
I understand completely. I read a resource from the sticky threads in here that convinced me that if you care about being a good person you should care about not ctbing for the sake of your loved one's wellbeing. That's what stopped me from running away from home in my attempt to become like a monk and meditate all day. All hope for the future of my life had been shattered and everyone around me were oblivious to it. But still, they kept me from disappearing/ctb.
 
Darkover

Darkover

Archangel
Jul 29, 2021
5,641
i would never stick around for the sake of others i never asked for any of this life and never wanted it in the first place, whats the point of living when almost nobody cares for us
 
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Nephis

Nephis

“Death should take me while I am in the mood.”
Sep 3, 2018
278
Your suffering is your own, you cannot control the suffering of others, all good parents feel the sadness of their children, it is terrible that we must all go through that suffering, however you must at some point consider, if your love for them outweighs the pain you feel, and if so jump into that love. For it will give you the hope to move forward with your life, where you may find happiness.

If not, then seek your own peace, seek your shores, blue skies, starry nights.

I at least will wait for you at the shores.

~I hope for you, comfort no matter where you go
 
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L

Ligottian

Enlightened
Dec 19, 2021
1,019
I feel you. I took a private vow to not suicide until both my parents had died. My mother died in 2016, my father in 2017. Both were in their 80's. Best wishes whatever you may decide to do.
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,566
It must be tiring feeling trapped in that situation but anyway only you can decide what to do. None of us are obligated to continue existing here but if you wish to delay the inevitable for the sake of other people then that is your choice, there really is too much suffering in existing. I just wish that people didn't so cruelly procreate in the first place so that there is no death and loss, which is an inevitable consequence of forcing life here.
 
locked*n*loaded

locked*n*loaded

Archangel
Apr 15, 2022
8,956
I'd never presume to know what you should do in your situation, but my life experience tells me that most of the time, when a child dies, a parent, in a good amount of time, does recover to a certain extent, and begins to live their life again. Of course, they never forget burying their child. Oftentimes, they may find new purpose in life, maybe even becoming an advocate to prevent others' suicides. It gives them purpose and a reason to go on. No one can say that's what would happen in your case. I agree with @Nephis in that when the pain you feel starts to outweigh the love you feel for your parents, that you may have to give additional consideration to your own situation, and that is something that only you can do.
 
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